Two and two continue t
Two and two continue to make four, in spite of the whine of the amateur for three, or the cry of the critic for five., James McNeill Whistler,
As you journey through
As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something., Hagar the Horrible,
The trouble with doing
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was., Walt West,
Nonviolence is the pol
Nonviolence is the policy of the vegetable kingdom, H. G. Wells, English author, historian, utopian (1866 1946)
Man is not a machine..
Man is not a machine... Although man most certainly processes information, he does not necessarily process it in the way computers do. Computers and men are not species of the same genus... However much intelligence computers may attain, now or in the furture, theirs must always be an intelligence alien to genuine human problems and concerns., Joseph Weizenbaum,
As far as we know, our
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error., Weisert,
The chalk marks are tr
The chalk marks are transient, the formulas eternal., S. Weinstein,
My doctor told me to s
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people., Orson Welles, US actor director (1915 1985)
Relative calm is expec
Relative calm is expected in South Central Los Angeles for the next several weeks, as looters stay home and try to program their new VCRs., Weekend Update,
Believe those who are
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it., Andre Gide, French critic, essayist, novelist (1869 1951)
Now let me explain why
Now let me explain why this makes intuitive sense., Prof. Larry Wasserman,
At Group L, Stoffel ov
At Group L, Stoffel oversees six firstrate programmers, a managerial challenge roughly comparable to herding cats., Washington Post Magazine, June 9 1985,
Government is not reas
Government is not reason it is not eloquence it is force! It is a dangerous servant and a terrible master., George Washington, First president of US (1732 1799)
They say that time cha
They say that time changes things, but actually you have to change them yourself., Andy Warhol, US artist (1928 1987)
Why is this thus? What
Why is this thus? What is the reason for this thusness?, Artemus Ward, US humorist (1834 1867)
Before the Gulf War st
Before the Gulf War started, the Iraqi Army was the the fourth largest in the world. Now, its the second largest army in Iraq., Wall Street Journal, March 15 1991,
Real programmers can w
Real programmers can write assembly code in any language. :), Larry Wall in,
History is more or le
History is more or less bunk., Henry Ford, US automobile industrialist (1863 1947)
It is easier to port a
It is easier to port a shell than a shell script., Larry Wall,
[End of diatribe. We n
[End of diatribe. We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming...], Larry Wall in Configure from the perl distribution,
Anyone who considers a
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin., John von Neumann,
You wake me up early i
You wake me up early in the morning to tell me I am right? Please wait until I am wrong., John von Neumann, on being phoned at 10 a.m.,
We can lick gravity, b
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming., Wernher von Braun, US (Germanborn) rocket engineer (1912 1977)
The two most common el
The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity., Harlan Ellison, US science fiction author screenwriter (1934 )
Man is the best comput
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor., Wernher von Braun, US (Germanborn) rocket engineer (1912 1977)
One could not be a suc
One could not be a successful scientist without realizing that, in contrast to the popular conception supported by newspapers and mothers of scientists, a goodly number of scientists are not only narrowminded and dull, but also just stupid., J. D. Watson, The Double Helix,
Who the hell wants to
Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?, H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.,
Anything too stupid to
Anything too stupid to be said is sung., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
A witty saying proves
A witty saying proves nothing., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
It is one of the super
It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
The superfluous is ver
The superfluous is very necessary., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
I have never made but
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
The first half of our
The first half of our
It is an infantile sup
It is an infantile superstition of the human spirit that virginity would be thought a virtue and not the barrier that separates ignorance from knowledge, Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
"Animals have these ad
"Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
The biggest things are
The biggest things are always the easiest to do because there is no competition., William Van Horne,
War is a matter of vit
War is a matter of vital importance to the State the province of life or death the road to survival or ruin. It is mandatory that it be thoroughly studied., Sun Tzu,
To conquer the enemy w
To conquer the enemy without resorting to war is the most desirable. The highest form of generalship is to conquer the enemy by strategy., Sun Tzu, The Art of War,
Human beings are the o
Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home., Bill Cosby, US comedian television actor (1937 )
Fundamentalists are to
Fundamentalists are to Christianity what paintbynumbers is to art., Robin Tyler,
The woman of my dreams
The woman of my dreams knows how to break into systems., Doug Tygar,
We are just tenants on
We are just tenants on this world. We have just been given a new lease, and a warning from the landlord., Arthur C. Clarke, 2010, English physicist science fiction author (1917 )
If a person offend you
If a person offend you and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures. Simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick., Mark Twain, Advice to Youth Speech, 1882, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
How come we rejoice at
How come we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Sacred cows make the b
Sacred cows make the best hamburger., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
I thoroughly disapprov
I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
God made the Idiot for
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board, Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Whenever you find that
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
If there is one basic
If there is one basic element in our Constitution, it is civilian control of the military., Harry S. Truman,
Old age is the most un
Old age is the most unexpected of things that can happen to a man., Trotsky,
The strongest of all w
The strongest of all warriors are these two Time and Patience., Leo Tolstoy, Russian mystic novelist (1828 1910)
I know that most men,
I know that most men, including those at ease with problems of the greatest complexity, can seldom accept even the simplest and most obvious truth if it be such as would oblige them to admit the falsity of conlusions which they have delighted in explaining to colleages, which they have proudly taught to others, and which they have woven, thread by thread, into the fabric of their lives., Leo Tolstoy, Russian mystic novelist (1828 1910)
Benson, you are so fre
Benson, you are so free of the ravages of intelligence, Time Bandits,
Truly great madness ca
Truly great madness can not be achieved without significant intelligence., Henrik Tikkanen,
An honest politician i
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought., Simon Cameron, US financier politician (1799 1889)
Sorry for the disaster
Sorry for the disaster. And thanks for your patience!, Chris Thyberg,
Its better to know som
Its better to know some of the questions, than all of the answers., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
Be true to your work,
Be true to your work, your word, and your friend., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
Do not be too moral. Y
Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life so. Aim above morality. Be not simply good be good for something., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
Why should we be in su
Why should we be in such desperate haste to succeed, and in such desperate enterprises? If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away., Henry David Thoreau, Walden, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
I have learned this at
I have learned this at least by my experiment: if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
It is something to be
It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts., Henry David Thoreau, Where I Live, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
Andrew is the operatin
Andrew is the operating system of the future and always will be., Mary R. Thompson,
For most folks, no new
For most folks, no news is good news for the press, good news is not news., Gloria Borger,
Just think, IBM and DE
Just think, IBM and DEC in the same room, and we did it., Ken Thompson, quoted by Dennis Ritchie,
I have a theory that t
I have a theory that the truth is never told during the 9 to 5 hours., Hunter S. Thompson, US journalist (1939 2005)
A cap of good acid cos
A cap of good acid costs five dollars and for that you can hear the Universal Symphony with God singing solo and the Holy Ghost on drums., Hunter S. Thompson, US journalist (1939 2005)
In the Norse mythology
In the Norse mythology Loki originally was on the side of the rest of the gods, helping them once or twice using a particularly nast forms of trickery. He was a cunning negotiator with a talent for technicalities. He was sort of the Norse equivalent of a lawyer, no doubt the reason they tied him down in a pit dripping acidic venom on him., Martin Terman,
A wizard cannot do eve
A wizard cannot do everything a fact most magicians are reticent to admit, let alone discuss with prospective clients. Still, the fact remains that there are certain objects, and people, that are, for one reason or another, completely immune to any direct magical spell. It is for this group of beings that the magician learns the subtleties of using indirect spells. It also does no harm, in dealing with these matters, to carry a large club near your person at all times., The Teachings of Ebenezum, Volume VIII,
Take your work serious
Take your work seriously but never take yourself seriously and do not take what happens either to yourself or your work seriously., Booth Tarkington, US novelist (1869 1946)
Better stop short than
Better stop short than fill to the brim. Oversharpen the blade, and the edge will soon blunt. Amass a store of gold and jade, and no one can protect it. Claim wealth and titles, and disaster will follow. Retire when the work is done. This is the way of heaven., Tao Te Ching,
Never express yourself
Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think., Niels Bohr, Danish physicist (1885 1962)
Anyone can hold the he
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm., Publilius Syrus, (~100 BC)
Newpaper editors are m
Newpaper editors are men who separate the wheat from the chaff, and then print the chaff., Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., US diplomat Democratic politician (1900 1965)
The problem with the c
The problem with the cutting edge is that someone has to bleed., Zalman Stern,
Distributed file syste
Distributed file systems are a cruel hoax., Zalman Stern, former ITC hacker diety,
The greatest pleasure
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do., Walter Bagehot, English economist journalist (1826 1877)
The mark of an immatur
The mark of an immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of a mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one., William Stekel,
If the programmer can
If the programmer can simulate a construct faster then the compiler can implement the construct itself, then the compiler writer has blown it badly., Guy L. Steele Jr., Tartan Laboratories,
Science cannot stop wh
Science cannot stop while ethics catches up and nobody should expect scientists to do all the thinking for the country., Elvin Stackman,
Start slow and taper o
Start slow and taper off., Walt Stack,
A Multitasking Timex S
A Multitasking Timex Sinclair, Matt Sorrels in reference to Andrew running XWindows,
We Americans want peac
We Americans want peace, and it is now evident that we must be prepared to demand it. For other peoples have wanted peace, and the peace they received was the peace of death., Rev. Francis J. Spellman, Archbishop of New York. 22 September, 1940,
The only truly secure
The only truly secure system is one that is powered off, cast in a block of concrete and sealed in a leadlined room with armed guards and even then I have my doubts., Eugene H. Spafford,
Democracy is a form of
Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country could do under firstclass management., Senator Soaper,
The creator of the uni
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers., Scott Adams, US cartoonist (1957 )
I have been thinking t
I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends... that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them., Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., Speech during 1952 Presidential Campaign, US diplomat Democratic politician (1900 1965)
He had occasional flas
He had occasional flashes of silence, that made his conversation perfectly delightful., Sydney Smith, referring to Macaulay, English essayist (1771 1845)
I found out that when
I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to., Yakov Smirnoff,
The future, according
The future, according to some scientists, will be exactly like the past, only far more expensive., John Sladek,
Education is what surv
Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten, B.F. Skinner,
When you betray somebo
When you betray somebody else, you also betray yourself., Isaac Bashevis Singer, US (Polishborn) Jewish author (1904 1991)
The chief value of mon
The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
In the beginning was t
In the beginning was the word. But by the time the second word was added to it, there was trouble. For with it came syntax..., John Simon,
Goto, n.: A programmin
Goto, n.: A programming tool that exists to allow structured programmers to complain about unstructured programmers., Ray Simard,
Fortunately, the secon
Fortunately, the secondtolast bug has just been fixed., Ray Simard,
Life is too important
Life is too important to take seriously., Corky Siegel,
Pay no attention to wh
Pay no attention to what the critics say there has never been set up a statue in honor of a critic., Jean Sibelius, Finnish composer patriot (1865 1957)
The only winner in the
The only winner in the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky, Solomon Short,
Common sense is instin
Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Martyrdom is the only
Martyrdom is the only way a person can become famous without ability., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
The trouble with our t
The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be., Paul Valery, French critic poet (1871 1945)
When a stupid man is d
When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty., GB Shaw,
Success covers a multi
Success covers a multitude of blunders., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
England and America ar
England and America are two countries seperated by the same language., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Democracy is a device
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Life is a disease and
Life is a disease and the only diference between one another is the stage of the disease at which he lives., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Except during the nine
Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Do you know what a pe
Do you know what a pessimist is? A person who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself and hates them for it., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
There is no satisfacti
There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it, G. B. Shaw,
Nobody knows the age o
Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better., Anonymous,
One of the advantages
One of the advantages of being a captain is being able to ask for advice without necessarily having to take it., William Shatner as Kirk, in Dagger of the Mind,
To thine own self be t
To thine own self be true And it must follow as the night the day Thou canst not be false to any man, William Shakespeare, Greatest English dramatist poet (1564 1616)
...adults are just obs
...adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them., Dr. Seuss, (as quoted in his obit in Time), US author illustrator (1904 1991)
One form to rule them
One form to rule them all, one form to find them, one form to bring them all and in the darkness rewrite the hell out of them, sendmail ruleset 3 comment from DEC.,
Any intelligent fool c
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction., E. F. Schumacher,
If we are going to sti
If we are going to stick to this damned quantumjumping, then I regret that I ever had anything to do with quantum theory., Erwin Schrodinger,
You can discover what
You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you., Eric Hoffer, (1902 1983)
For fourfifths of our
For fourfifths of our history, our planet was populated by pond scum., J.W. Schopf,
If you want to know yo
If you want to know your true opinion of someone, watch the effect produced in you by the first sight of a letter from him., Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher (1788 1860)
Immortality a fate wo
Immortality a fate worse than death., Edgar A. Shoaff,
If someone tells you t
If someone tells you that the fully armored man of the Middle Ages was so encumbered by his armor that he could not rise if he fell, you may well ask yourself, first, if it is reasonable to assume that professional soldiers would go on wearing armor that kept them from fighting and second, if this theory is in line with what you know of the heavily armored men of your personal acquaintance., Niccola Sebastiani,
Oh, what tangled webs
Oh, what tangled webs we weave, When we first practice to deceive., Sir Walter Scott, Scottish author novelist (1771 1832)
Each religion, by the
Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny., George Santayana, US (Spanishborn) philosopher (1863 1952)
I may not have gone wh
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
Skepticism is the chas
Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, and it is shameful to surrender it too soon or to the first comer: there is nobility in preserving it coolly and proudly through long youth, until at last, in the ripeness of instinct and discretion, it can be safely exchanged for fidelity and happiness., George Santayana, US (Spanishborn) philosopher (1863 1952)
This is no time to act
This is no time to act like a gentleman. I am a cad and shall react like one., George Sanders,
Remember folks. Street
Remember folks. Street lights timed for 35 mph are also timed for 70 mph., Jim Samuels,
In an optimal world, I
In an optimal world, I would not be necessary., James Price Salsman,
But the fact that some
But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
A celibate clergy is a
A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism., Carl Sagan, Contact, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
In order to make an ap
In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe., Carl Sagan, Cosmos, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
Who are we? We find th
Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
The universe is not re
The universe is not required to be in perfect harmony with human ambition., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
Skeptical scrutiny is
Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsense., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
It is of interest to n
It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English up to fifty words used in correct context no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
All of the books in th
All of the books in the world contain no more information than is broadcast as video in a single large American city in a single year. Not all bits have equal value., Carl Sagan, US astronomer popularizer of astronomy (1934 1996)
Knowing how things wor
Knowing how things work is the basis for appreciation, and is thus a source of civilized delight., William Safire, US columnist speechwriter (1929 )
A poor fool indeed is
A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking (meant) for others!, DonatienAlphonseFrancois de Sade,
You say that my way of
You say that my way of thinking cannot be tolerated? What of it? The man who alters his way of thinking to suit others is a fool. My way of thinking is the result of my reflections. It is part of my inner being, the way I am made. I do not contradict them, and would not even if I wished to. For my system, which you disapprove of, is also my greatest comfort in life, the source of all my happiness it means more to me than my life itself., Marquis de Sade,
All military type fire
All military type firearms are to be handed in immediately... The SS, SA and Stahlhelm give every respectable German man the opportunity of campaigning with them. Therefore anyone who does not belong to one of the above named organisations and who unjustifiably nevertheless keeps his weapon... must be regarded as an enemy of the national government., SA Oberfuhrer of Bad Tolz, March, 1933.,
You should never bet a
You should never bet against anything in science at odds of more than about 10.12.2008 to 1., Ernest Rutherford, British chemist physicist (1871 1937)
Sanity calms, but madn
Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting., John Russell,
The important thing is
The important thing is not to stop questioning., Albert Einstein, US (Germanborn) physicist (1879 1955)
Patriotism is the will
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons., Bertrand Russell, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
The whole problem with
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts., Bertrand Russell, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
In all things it is a
In all things it is a good idea to hang a question mark now and then on the things we have taken for granted., Bertrand Russell, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
Many people would rath
Many people would rather die than think in fact, most do., Bertrand Russell, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
I long ago came to the
I long ago came to the conclusion that all life is six to five against., Damon Runyon,
The best executive is
The best executive is one who has sense enough to pick good people to do what he wants done, and selfrestraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it., Theodore Roosevelt, 26th president of US (1858 1919)
There is nobody so irr
There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have., Don Herold,
The great virtue of my
The great virtue of my radicalism lies in the fact that I am perfectly ready, if necessary, to be radical on the conservative side., Theodore Roosevelt, 26th president of US (1858 1919)
Do what you can, with
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are., Theodore Roosevelt, 26th president of US (1858 1919)
I think we consider to
I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird, and not enough the bad luck of the early worm., Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd president of US (1882 1945)
A conservative is a ma
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk., Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd president of US (1882 1945)
No one can make you fe
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent., Eleanor Roosevelt, US diplomat reformer (1884 1962)
I have one of those re
I have one of those real old American built cars. The kind that just PUNCHES through accidents., Kevin Rooney,
Disbelief in magic can
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business., Tom Robbins, US novelist (1936 )
People love high ideal
People love high ideals, but they got to be about 33percent plausible., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
On account of us being
On account of us being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
I belong to no organiz
I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
The more original a di
The more original a discovery, the more obvious it seems afterwards., Arthur Koestler, British (Hungarianborn) author (1905 1983)
Alexander Hamilton sta
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
It has beeen said that
It has beeen said that the love of money is the root of all evil. The want of money is so quite as truly., Samuel Butler, English composer, novelist, satiric author (1835 1902)
Money is like muck, no
Money is like muck, not good except it be spread., Sir Francis Bacon, English author, courtier, philosopher (1561 1626)
The discovery of this
The discovery of this strange society was a curiously refreshing thing to realize that there were ten new trades in the world was like looking at the first ship or the first plough. It made a man feel what he should feel, that he was still in the childhood of the world., G. K. Chesterton, The Tremendous Adventures of Major Brown, English author mystery novelist (1874 1936)
Our love is God. Lets
Our love is God. Lets go grab a slushie., J.D., Heathers,
As far as the laws of
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality., Albert Einstein, US (Germanborn) physicist (1879 1955)
Power tends to corrupt
Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely., Lord Acton, in a letter to Bishop Mandell Creighton, April 3 1887.,
... Nature, whose swee
... Nature, whose sweet rains fall of just and unjust alike, will have clefts in the rocks where I may hide, and secret valleys in whose silence I may weep undetected. She will hang the night with stars so that I may walk abroad in the darkness without stumbling, and send the wind over my footprints so that none may track me to my hurt: she will cleanse me in great waters, and with bitter herbs make me whole., Oscar Wilde, De Profundis, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
That ready wit, which
That ready wit, which you so partially allow me, ... may create many admirers but, take my word for it, it makes few friends. It shines and dazzles like the noonday sun, but, like that, too, it is very apt to scorch, and therefore is always feared. The milder morning and evening light and heat of that planet soothe and calm our minds. Never seek for wit if it present itself, well and good but even then, let your judgement interpose, and take care that it be not at the expense of anybody., Philip Dormer Stanhope, 4th earl of Chesterfield, 1749,
Streets full of water
Streets full of water please advise., Robert Benchley, US actor, author, humorist (1889 1945)
Stone walls do not a p
Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage., Richard Lovelace, To Althea from Prison,
Poets are the unacknow
Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world., Shelley, incomplete, poets,
We must love one anoth
We must love one another and die., W.H. Auden, revised Sept. 1, 1939,
Because he once wrote,
Because he once wrote, We must love one another or die, he can command me to follow him., E.M. Forster,
We must love one anoth
We must love one another or die., W.H. Auden, September 1, 1939,
In the future everyone
In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes., Andy Warhol, US artist (1928 1987)
Do not fear death so m
Do not fear death so much but rather the inadequate life., Bertolt Brecht, German Communist dramatist (1898 1956)
Better to write for yo
Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self., Cyril Connolly, (1903 1974)
I take the view, and a
I take the view, and always have, that if you cannot say what you are going to say in twenty minutes you ought to go away and write a book about it., Lord Brabazon, (1884 1964)
There are two kinds of
There are two kinds of people, those who finish what they start and so on., Robert Byrne,
If Beethoven had been
If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of 22 it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation., Tom Stoppard, British dramatist screenwriter (1937 )
Personally I rather lo
Personally I rather look forward to a computer program winning the world [chess] championship. Humanity needs a lesson in humility., Richard Dawkings:, The Selfish Gene,
Too many have dispense
Too many have dispensed with generosity in order to practice charity., Albert Camus, French existentialist author philosopher (1913 1960)
The modern definition
The modern definition of racist is someone who is winning an argument with a liberal, Peter Brimelow, National Review (2/1/93), ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (960, One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries., A. A. Milne, English juvenile author (1882 1956)) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (961, Not many people know this ... but I happen to be famous., Sam Malone, Cheers, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (962, Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it., George Santayana, US (Spanishborn) philosopher (1863 1952)) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (963, The history of science is everywhere speculative. It is a marvelous hiatory. It makes you proud to be a human being., Karl R. Popper, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (964, The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit., Somerset Maugham, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (965, When I was oneandtwenty, I heard a wise man say, Give pounds and crowns and guineas, But not your heart away. Give pearls away and rubies, But keep your fancy free." But I was oneandtwenty, No use to talk to me., A.E. Houseman, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (966, You can never get the smell of smoke out. Like the smell of failure in life., John Updike, Rabbit Redux, US author (1932 )) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (967, "We are survival machines robot vehicles blindly programmed to preserve the selfish molecules known as genes., Richard Dawkings:, The Selfish Gene,
That old saw about the
That old saw about the early bird just proves that the worm should have stayed in bed., Robert Heinlein, Time Enough For Love, US science fiction author (1907 1988)
I could not say I beli
I could not say I believe. I know! I have had the experience of being gripped by something that is stronger than myself, something that people call God., Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist (1875 1961)
Patriotism is the last
Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel., Samuel Johnson, Letter to Lord Chesterfield, 1775, English author, critic, lexicographer (1709 1784)
The Pope! How many div
The Pope! How many divisions has _he_ got ?, Joseph Stalin, Winston Chuirchill, The Second World War, vol 1, Georgian Soviet politician (1879 1953)
Seek not for fresher f
Seek not for fresher founts afar, Just drop you bucket where you are., Sam Walter Foss, Back Country Poems, 1892,
I have lived some thir
I have lived some thirty years on this planet and I have yet to hear the first syllable of valuable or even earnest advice from my seniors., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
Time is what prevents
Time is what prevents everything from happening at once., John Archibald Wheeler, American J. of Physics, 1978 46 323,
When I received the No
When I received the Nobel Prize, the only big lump sum of money I have ever seen, I had to do something with it. The easiest way to drop this hot potato was to invest it, to buy shares. I knew that World War II was coming and I was afraid that if I had shares which rise in case of war, I would wish for war. So I asked my agent to buy shares which go down in the event of war. This he did. I lost my money and saved my soul., Albert SzentGyorgyi, The Crazy Ape,
The best way to predic
The best way to predict the future is to invent it., Alan Kay,
He who joyfully marche
He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would fully suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, senseless brutality, deplorable patriotism, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is I would rather be torn to shreds than be part of so base an action! It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder., Albert Einstein, US (Germanborn) physicist (1879 1955)
Would you please shut
Would you please shut up and sit down!, George Bush, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993, US Republican politician (1924 )
It is about a socialis
It is about a socialist, antifamily political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians., Pat Robertson, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993,
We believe he wanted t
We believe he wanted to win in the worst way., Don Eslinger, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993,
Your food stamps will
Your food stamps will be stopped effective March, 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances., Greenville County (S.C.) Department of Social Services, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993,
Half of the American p
Half of the American people never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half., Gore Vidal, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993, US author dramatist (1925 )
Many, if not all, of m
Many, if not all, of my presidential opponents are certifiable idiots., Miriam Defensor Santiago, The World Almanac and Book of Facts, 1993,
The society which scor
The society which scorns excellence in plumbing as a humble activity and tolerates shoddiness in philosophy because it is an exalted activity will have neither good plumbing nor good philosophy...neither its pipes nor its theories will hold water., John W. Gardner, US administrator (1912 )
...in the lexicon of t
...in the lexicon of the political class, the word sacrifice means that the citizens are supposed to mail even more of their income to Washington so that the political class will not have to sacrifice the pleasure of spending it., George Will, Newsweek, 2/22/93,
The universe is made o
The universe is made of stories, not atoms., Muriel Rukeyser,
Internet is so big, so
Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life., Andrew Brown,
I never did give them
I never did give them hell. I just told the truth, and they thought it was hell., Harry S Truman, in Look, Apr. 3 1956, 33rd president of US (1884 1972)
Is it better to be the
Is it better to be the lover or the loved one? Neither, if your cholesterol is over six hundred. By love, of course, I refer to romantic love the love between man and woman, rather than between mother and child, or a boy and his dog, or two headwaiters., Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
Whosoever shall not fa
Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence so why bother shaving?, Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
Doing abominations is
Doing abominations is against the law, particularly if the abominations are done while wearing a lobster bib., Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A DOE Unbearably lovely music is heard as the curtain rises, and we see the woods on a summer afternoon. A fawn dances on and nibbles slowly at some leaves. He drifts lazily through the soft foliage. Soon he starts coughing and drops dead., Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
On the plus side, deat
On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down., Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
Thought: why does man
Thought: why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only for food: frequently there must be a beverage., Woody Allen, Without Feathers, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
To be conservative at
To be conservative at 20 is heartless and to be a liberal at 60 is plain idiocy., Sir Winston Churchill, British politician (1874 1965)
To laugh often and muc
To laugh often and much to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends to appreciate beauty to find the best in others to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded., Ralph Waldo Emerson, US essayist poet (1803 1882)
All Bibles are manmade
All Bibles are manmade., Thomas A. Edison, US inventor (1847 1931)
A cult is a religion w
A cult is a religion with no political power., Tom Wolfe, US author journalist (1931 )
Ignorance is king, man
Ignorance is king, many would not prosper by its abdication., "A Canticle for Leibowitz",
A mind forever voyagin
A mind forever voyaging through strange seas of thought, alone., William Wordsworth, English poet (1770 1850)
If a cluttered desk si
If a cluttered desk signs a cluttered mind, Of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?, Albert Einstein.,
Truth is beautiful, wi
Truth is beautiful, without doubt but so are lies., Ralph Waldo Emerson, US essayist poet (1803 1882)
Truth is more of a str
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
The peasants of the As
The peasants of the Asturias believe that in every litter of wolves there is one pup that is killed by the mother for fear that on growing up it would devour the other little ones., Victor Hugo, Les Miserables, French dramatist, novelist, poet (1802 1885)
May you never know hun
May you never know hunger May you love with a full heart The light burn in your eyes May the fire be your friend And the sea rock you gently May the moon light your way Till the wind sets you free, Shriekback, Cradle Song,
Do not meddle in the a
Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger., Tolkien,
The two most evangelic
The two most evangelical groups in the world are atheists and vegetarians, especially the least knowledgeable and least intelligent individuals within those groups., Clark Coleman,
Gratitude is merely th
Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors., Francois de La Rochefoucauld, French author moralist (1613 1680)
The inherent vice of c
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings. The inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of misery., Churchill,
Trapped, like a trap i
Trapped, like a trap in a trap., Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
God is the immemorial
God is the immemorial refuge of the incompetent, thehelpless, the miserable. They find not only sanctuary in His arms, but also a kind of superiority, soothing to their macerated egos He will set them above their betters., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
I think there are innu
I think there are innumerable gods. What we here on earth call God is a little tribal God who has made an awful mess. Certainly forces operating trough human conciousness control events., William S. Buroughs, Paris Review, Fall 1965,
Anyone who has got a b
Anyone who has got a book collection and a garden wants for nothing., Cicero, Roman author, orator, politician (106 BC 43 BC)
If language is not cor
If language is not correct, then what is said is not what is meant if what is said is not what is meant, then what must be done remains undone if this remains undone, morals and art will deteriorate if justice goes astray, the people will stand about in helpless confusion. Hence there must be no arbitrariness in what is said. This matters above everything., Confucius, Chinese philosopher reformer (551 BC 479 BC)
In this world of sin a
In this world of sin and sorrow, there is always something to be thankful for as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
Oh, the tangled webs w
Oh, the tangled webs we weave When we practice to deceive., Sir Walter Scott, Marmion, Scottish author novelist (1771 1832)
If you want to go some
If you want to go somewhere, goto is the best way to get there., Ken Thompson,
Just think IBM and DE
Just think IBM and DEC in the same room and we did it. Makes you feel warm inside., Ken Thompson,
Suburbia is where the
Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them., Bill Vaughan,
I know nothing., Ken T
I know nothing., Ken Thompson,
SCCS is the sourcecode
SCCS is the sourcecode motel your code checks in but it never checks out., Ken Thompson,
Maybe I should have sc
Maybe I should have screwed up., Ken Thompson,
When in doubt, use bru
When in doubt, use brute force, Ken Thompson,
Faith: not *wanting* t
Faith: not *wanting* to know what is true., Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher (1844 1900)
In Christianity neithe
In Christianity neither morality nor religion come into contact with reality at any point., Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher (1844 1900)
Politics is no exact s
Politics is no exact science., Otto von Bismark,
I believe that sex is
I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy., Steve Martin, US comedian movie actor (1945 )
Those who do not under
Those who do not understand UNIX are condemned to reinvent it badly., Henry Spencer,
A candour affected is
A candour affected is a dagger concealed., Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 9., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
To succeed in the worl
To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be wellmannered., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
A man does not sin by
A man does not sin by commission only, but often by ommission., Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 9., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
To stand up or be set
To stand up or be setup?, Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 6., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
To refrain from imitat
To refrain from imitation is the best revenge., Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 6., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
A little flesh, a litt
A little flesh, a little breath, and a Reason to rule all that is myself., Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 2., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
Where life is possible
Where life is possible at all, a right life is possible life in a palace is possible therefore even in a palace a right life is possible., Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, book 5., Roman Emperor, A.D. 161180 (121 AD 180 AD)
It is no measure of he
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society., Krishnamurti,
When you have read the
When you have read the Bible, you will know it is the word of God, because you will have found it the key to your own heart, your own happiness, and your own duty., Woodrow Wilson, 28th president of US (1856 1924)
If we abide by the pri
If we abide by the principles taught by the Bible, our country will go on prospering., Daniel Webster, US diplomat, lawyer, orator, politician (1782 1852)
A thorough knowledge o
A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education., Theodore Roosevelt, 26th president of US (1858 1919)
The Bible tells us to
The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies probably because generally they are the same people., G.K. Chesterton,
I call that a scumhead
I call that a scumhead., James Joyce, Finnegans Wake, Irish author (1882 1941)
"If you were my husban
"If you were my husband, i would feed you poison." If you were my wife, madam, i would take it!, Lady Astor and William Churchill, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (883, I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise., Red Skelton, ) INSERT INTO `quotes` VALUES (884, Coolidge is dead" How could they tell?, Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
He has a splendid repe
He has a splendid repertoire of 500 words. Why does he insist on using only 150?, Abba Eban, Israeli (S. Africanborn) diplomat politician (1915 2002)
Too bad all the people
Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair., George Burns, US actor comedian (1896 1996)
How do you govern a co
How do you govern a country which has 246 different kinds of cheese?, Charles De Gaulle, French general politician (1890 1970)
Life is like an icecre
Life is like an icecream cone, you have to lick it one day at a time., Charles M. Schulz, as Charlie Brown, Peanuts, cartoon strip, US cartoonist (1922 2000)
Pluralitas non ponenda
Pluralitas non ponenda est sine necessitate, Occam,
The Churches must lear
The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it., George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Without a doubt the gr
Without a doubt the greatest injury of all was done by basing morals on myth. For, sooner or later, myth is recognized for what it is, and disappears. Then morality loses the foundation on which it has been built., Lord Samuel, Romanes Lecture, 1947,
To become a popular re
To become a popular religion, it is only necessary for a superstition to enslave a philosohpy., William Ralph Inge, 1920, English author Anglican prelate (1860 1954)
It is a mistake to sup
It is a mistake to suppose that God is only, or even chiefly, concerned with religion., Archbishop William Temple, 1955,
The world itself is th
The world itself is the will to power and nothing else! And you yourself are the will to power and nothing else!, Friedrich Nietzsche, The Will to Power, German philosopher (1844 1900)
Procrastination is the
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday., Don Marquis, US humorist (1878 1937)
But the only way of di
But the only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible., Arthur C. Clarke, English physicist science fiction author (1917 )
USA Today has come out
USA Today has come out with a new survey apparently, three out of every four people make up 75,00% of the population., Dave Letterman,
Rem tene, verba sequnt
Rem tene, verba sequntur (Keep to the subject, and the words will follow), Cato the Censor (?),
You believe that there
You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that and shudder., Bible, James 02:19:00 (New International Version),
The point of philosoph
The point of philosophy is to start with something so simple as not to seem worth stating, and to end with something so paradoxical that no one will believe it., Bertrand Russell, The Philosophy of Logical Atomism, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
May you be in heaven a
May you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows your dead, unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
May the road rise to m
May the road rise to meet you, May the wind be always at your back, May the sun shine warm upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again may god hold you in the palm of his hand, unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
Lack of money is no ob
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle., Ken Hakuta,
Love is much like a wi
Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense., Mark A. Overby,
The unexamined life is
The unexamined life is not worth living to a human., Attributed by Plato to Socrates, Apology,
A dog will look up on
A dog will look up on you a cat will look down on you however, a pig will see you eye to eye and know it has found an equal., Churchill,
History will be kind t
History will be kind to me, for I intend to write it., Churchill,
If you choose not to d
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice., Rush (the band), Freewill,
Get your facts first,
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please, Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
We have no government
We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge or gallantry would break the strongest cords of our Constitution as a whale goes through a net. Our Constitution is designed only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate for any other., John Adams, US diplomat politician (1735 1826)
... Religion ... [is]
... Religion ... [is] the basis and foundation of government ... before any man can be considered as a member of civil society, he must be considered as a subject of the Governor of the Universe., James Madison, 4th president of US (1751 1836)
We have staked the who
We have staked the whole future of American civilization, not upon the power of government, far from it. We have staked the future of all of our political institutions upon the capacity of mankind of selfgovernment upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of God., James Madison, (attributed), 4th president of US (1751 1836)
A nation which does no
A nation which does not remember what it was yesterday, does not know what it is today, nor what it is trying to do. We are trying to do a futile thing if we do not know where we came from or what we have been about., Woodrow Wilson, 28th president of US (1856 1924)
Make money, money, hon
Make money, money, honestly if you canif not, by any means at all, make money., Quintus Horatius Flaccus [Horace] 65BC 8BC,
Solutions are not the
Solutions are not the answer., Richard Nixon,
Wise men talk because
Wise men talk because they have something to say fools, because they have to say something., Plato, Greek author philosopher in Athens (427 BC 347 BC)
The illiterate of the
The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn., Alvin Toffler,
Dreaming permits each
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives., William Dement,
Democracy is a process
Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame., Laurence J. Peter, US educator writer (1919 1988)
My work is a game, a v
My work is a game, a very serious game., M. C. Escher, Dutch artist (1898 1972)
What is written withou
What is written without effort is in general read without pleasure., Samuel Johnson, English author, critic, lexicographer (1709 1784)
Never offend people wi
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance., Sam Brown, Washington Post, 1977,
The young have aspirat
The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have reminiscences of what never happened., Saki, British (Burmanborn) short story author (1870 1916)
My theory of evolution
My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted., Steven Wright, US comedian and actor (1955 )
A lot of people mistak
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience., Doug Larson,
Cynics regarded everyb
Cynics regarded everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regarded everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves., Robert Anton Wilson,
A little nonsense now
A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men., Roald Dahl, (Willy Wonka) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, British juvenile author (1916 1990)
Nobody realizes that s
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal., Albert Camus, French existentialist author philosopher (1913 1960)
The most wasted of all
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter., e e cummings, US poet (1894 1962)
It has been my experie
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues., Abraham Lincoln, 16th president of US (1809 1865)
Punctuality is the vir
Punctuality is the virtue of the bored., Evelyn Waugh, Diaries of Evelyn Waugh (1976), English novelist satirist (1903 1966)
The point of philosoph
The point of philosophy is to start with something so simple as not to seem worth stating, and to end with something so paradoxical that no one will believe it., Bertrand Russell, The Philosophy of Logical Atomism, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
It is by the goodness
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them., Mark Twain, Following the Equator (1897), US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
She had a pretty gift
She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
Grownups never underst
Grownups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them., Antoine de SaintExupery, The Little Prince, 1943, French writer (1900 1944)
God is a comedian play
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
The most beautiful thi
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science., Albert Einstein, US (Germanborn) physicist (1879 1955)
In real life, unlike i
In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be., Hubert H. Humphrey, US politician (1911 1978)
I have found the best
I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it., Harry S Truman, 33rd president of US (1884 1972)
The direct use of forc
The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations., David Friedman,
The real art of conver
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment., Dorothy Nevill,
My definition of a fre
My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular., Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., Speech in Detroit, 7 Oct. 1952, US diplomat Democratic politician (1900 1965)
That you may retain yo
That you may retain your selfrespect, it is better to displease the people by doing what you know is right, than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong., William J. H. Boetcker,
They that can give up
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety., Benjamin Franklin, Historical Review of Pennsylvania, 1759, US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, printer (1706 1790)
Words ought to be a li
Words ought to be a little wild for they are the assaults of thought on the unthinking., John Maynard Keynes, English economist (1883 1946)
The key to being a goo
The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided., Casey Stengel, US baseball manager (1890 1975)
Any fool can make a ru
Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
Whatever you do will b
Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
Education is a progre
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance., Will Durant, US historian (1885 1981)
For every action there
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program., Bob Wells,
Your true value depend
Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with., Bob Wells,
Everything you can ima
Everything you can imagine is real., Pablo Picasso, Spanish Cubist painter (1881 1973)
Anything not worth doi
Anything not worth doing is worth not doing well. Think about it., Elias Schwartz,
Speak the truth, but l
Speak the truth, but leave immediately after., Slovenian Proverb,
Talking with you is so
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience., Bill Watterson, Calvin Hobbes, US cartoonist (1958 )
Everyone thinks of cha
Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself., Leo Tolstoy, Russian mystic novelist (1828 1910)
Washington is a city o
Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm., John F. Kennedy, US Democratic politician (1917 1963)
Half our life is spent
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save., Will Rogers, New York TImes, Apr. 29 1930, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
Wars teach us not to l
Wars teach us not to love our enemies, but to hate our allies., W. L. George,
The difference between
The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer., Victor Borge, US (Danishborn) comedian pianist (1909 2000)
His lack of education
His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
He can compress the mo
He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas of any man I ever met., Abraham Lincoln, 16th president of US (1809 1865)
There is no expedient
There is no expedient to which a man will not go to avoid the labor of thinking., Thomas A. Edison, US inventor (1847 1931)
Television has raised
Television has raised writing to a new low., Samuel Goldwyn, US (Polishborn) movie producer (1882 1974)
The one function TV ne
The one function TV news performs very well is that when there is no news we give it to you with the same emphasis as if there were., David Brinkley, US television newscaster (1920 2003)
Television has done mu
Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it., Alfred Hitchcock, British movie director (1899 1980)
For a list of all the
For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three., Alice Kahn,
The avoidance of taxes
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward., John Maynard Keynes, English economist (1883 1946)
The penalty for succe
The penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you., Nancy Astor, British politician (1879 1964)
The surest way to make
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him., Robert Benchley, US actor, author, humorist (1889 1945)
An ardent supporter of
An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens., Robert Benchley, US actor, author, humorist (1889 1945)
Everything is funny as
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else., Will Rogers, Illiterate Digest (1924), Warning to Jokers: lay off the prince, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
One can survive everyt
One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good reputation., Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
The public will believ
The public will believe anything, so long as it is not founded on truth., Edith Sitwell, English biographer, critic, novelist, poet (1887 1964)
The public is wonderfu
The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius., Oscar Wilde, The Critic as Artist, 1891, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
To err is dysfunctiona
To err is dysfunctional, to forgive codependent., Berton Averre,
Everything in the worl
Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity., Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German dramatist, novelist, poet, scientist (1749 1832)
Usually, terrible thin
Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not really progress at all, but just terrible things., Russell Baker, US columnist journalist (1925 )
Under certain circumst
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Any American who is pr
Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so., Gore Vidal, US author dramatist (1925 )
If absolute power corr
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?, Harry Shearer,
Politics is perhaps th
Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary., Robert Louis Stevenson, Scottish author (1850 1894)
Politics is the skille
Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects., Lester B. Pearson, Canadian Prime Minister 19631968 (1897 1972)
Politics is the art of
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy., Ernest Benn,
I despise the pleasure
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise., Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, English letter author poet (1689 1762)
Illusion is the first
Illusion is the first of all pleasures., Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
There is only one thin
There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers., William James, US Pragmatist philosopher psychologist (1842 1910)
Acting is merely the a
Acting is merely the art of keeping a large group of people from coughing., Sir Ralph Richardson, quoted in New York Herald Tribune, May 19 1946, (1902 1983)
There are more fools i
There are more fools in the world than there are people., Heinrich Heine, German critic poet (1797 1856)
People will buy anythi
People will buy anything that is one to a customer., Sinclair Lewis, US novelist (1885 1951)
Patriotism is your con
Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
You must first have a
You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience., Stanislaw J. Lec, Unkempt Thoughts, Polish writer (1909 1966)
Parents were invented
Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore., Ogden Nash, US humorist poet (1902 1971)
I find nothing more de
I find nothing more depressing than optimism., Paul Fussell,
No opera plot can be s
No opera plot can be sensible, for people do not sing when they are feeling sensible., W. H. Auden, US (Englishborn) critic poet (1907 1973)
A newspaper consists o
A newspaper consists of just the same number of words, whether there be any news in it or not., Henry Fielding, English dramatist novelist (1707 1754)
This is the devilish t
This is the devilish thing about foreign affairs: they are foreign and will not always conform to our whim., James Reston, New York Times, June 12 1968, (1909 )
Trying to determine wh
Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock., Ben Hecht, US author dramatist (1893 1964)
Dealing with network e
Dealing with network executives is like being nibbled to death by ducks., Eric Sevareid,
A nation is a society
A nation is a society united by delusions about its ancestry and by common hatred of its neighbors., William Ralph Inge, English author Anglican prelate (1860 1954)
Classical music is the
Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune., Kin Hubbard, (1868 1930)
The movies are the onl
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
The average, healthy,
The average, healthy, welladjusted adult gets up at seventhirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible., Jean Kerr,
There is no moral prec
There is no moral precept that does not have something inconvenient about it., Denis Diderot, French author, encyclopedist, philosopher (1713 1784)
Skill without imaginat
Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art., Tom Stoppard, Artist Descending a Staircase, British dramatist screenwriter (1937 )
Politics is supposed t
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first., Ronald Reagan, 40th president of US (1911 2004)
Truth is more of a str
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
It is by universal mis
It is by universal misunderstanding that all agree. For if, by ill luck, people understood each other, they would never agree., Charles Baudelaire, French poet (1821 1867)
All men are frauds. Th
All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
Nothing fixes a thing
Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it., Michel de Montaigne, French essayist (1533 1592)
Why is it that our mem
Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?, Francois de La Rochefoucauld, French author moralist (1613 1680)
Pity the meek, for the
Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth., Don Marquis, US humorist (1878 1937)
We were happily marrie
We were happily married for eight months. Unfortunately, we were married for four and a half years., Nick Faldo,
My fellow Americans, I
My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing begins in five minutes., Ronald Reagan, Said during a radio microphone test, 1984, 40th president of US (1911 2004)
The conception of two
The conception of two people living together for twentyfive years without having a cross word suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep., Alan Patrick Herbert,
Man is the only animal
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them., Samuel Butler, English composer, novelist, satiric author (1835 1902)
It is even harder for
It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
In times of joy, all o
In times of joy, all of us wished we possessed a tail we could wag., W.H. Auden,
We need to make a deci
We need to make a decision, no matter what it is., Dr. Suzanne Botts,
Whenever you find that
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
There are tones of voi
There are tones of voices that mean more than words., Robert Frost, US poet (1874 1963)
He who fights too long
He who fights too long against dragons becomes a dragon himself and if you gaze too long into the abyss, the abyss will gaze into you., Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher (1844 1900)
Do not wrong or hate y
Do not wrong or hate your neighbor, for it is not he that you wrong: You wrong yourself., Shawnee Indian Chant,
I was born on the prai
I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free and there was nothing to break the light of the sun. I was born where there were no enclosures..., Geronimo,
My friends, your peopl
My friends, your people have both intellect and heart you use these to consider in what way you can do the best to live., Spotted Tail (Sioux Indian),
You cannot stand anywh
You cannot stand anywhere in the universe that is outside of yourself., Deepak Chopra,
Lying increases the cr
Lying increases the creative faculties, expands the ego, and lessens the frictions of social contacts., Clare Booth Luce, US diplomat, dramatist, journalist, politician (1903 1987)
No one ever told me gr
No one ever told me grief felt so much like fear., C. S. Lewis, English essayist juvenile novelist (1898 1963)
There is a time for de
There is a time for departure even when there is no certain place to go., Tennessee Williams, US dramatist (1911 1983)
"Nothing for preservin
"Nothing for preserving the body like having no heart.", John PetitSenn,
If the day and the nig
If the day and the night are such that you greet them with with joy, and life emits a fragrance like flowers and sweetscented herbs, more elastic, more starry, more immortalthat is your success., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
To avoid criticism, do
To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing and be nothing., Elbert Hubbard, US author (1856 1915)
The worst thing you ca
The worst thing you can do for those you love is the things they could and should do themselves., Abraham Lincoln, 16th president of US (1809 1865)
Consider the rights of
Consider the rights of others before your own feelings, and the feelings of others before your own rights., John Wooden, US basketball coach (1910 )
There is no death. Onl
There is no death. Only a change of worlds., Chief Seattle,
Man can believe the im
Man can believe the impossible, but man can never believe the improbable., Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
Never judge a book by
Never judge a book by its movie., J. W. Eagan,
Doubts are more cruel
Doubts are more cruel than the worst of truths., Moliere, French actor comic dramatist (1622 1673)
When you see a good ma
When you see a good man, try to emulate his example, and when you see a bad man, search yourself for his faults., Confucious,
The man who follows th
The man who follows the crowd will get no farther than the crowd. A man who walks alone is likely to get places no one has ever been before., Alan AshleyPitt,
The fact that a believ
The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than saying a drunken man is happier than a sober man., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Not a shred of evidenc
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious., Brendan Gill,
Success means doing th
Success means doing the best we can with what we have. Success is the doing, not the getting in the trying, not the triumph. Success is a personal standard, reaching for the highest that is in us, becoming all that we can be. If we do our best, we are a success. Success is the maximumutilization of the ability that you have., Zig Ziglar,
It is by not always th
It is by not always thinking of yourself, if you can manage it, that you might somehow be happy. Until you can make room in your life for someone as important to you as yourself, you will always be searching and lost...., Richard Bach,
Far away in the sunshi
Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead., Louisa May Alcott, US juvenile novelist (1832 1888)
Dream lofty dreams, as
Dream lofty dreams, as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you one day shall be: your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil., James Allen,
A slipping gear in you
A slipping gear in your M203 grenade launcher can cause it to fire when you least expect it. This could make you very unpopular with what is left of your unit., Unknown, Army Magazine of Preventive Maintenance, Quotations by unknown authors )
Convictions are the mo
Convictions are the more dangerous enemy of truth than lies., Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher (1844 1900)
What is ten thousand y
What is ten thousand years? Time is short for one who thinks, endless for one who yearns., Alain,
When we remember we ar
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Hatred is the anger of
Hatred is the anger of the weak., Alphonse Daudet,
Intelligence is nothin
Intelligence is nothing without delight., Paul Claudel,
In solitude especialy
In solitude especialy do we begin to appreciate the advantage of living with someone who can think., Henry David Thoreau, US Transcendentalist author (1817 1862)
We are the total of ou
We are the total of our longings., Guy Gavriel Kay,
You may regret your si
You may regret your silence once, but you will regret your words often., Ian Gabirol,
Maybe the gift of any
Maybe the gift of any great person is the power to converse with our own hearts., Randall Wallace,
The only limits are th
The only limits are those of vision., James Broughton,
Only a life lived for
Only a life lived for others is a life worth while., Albert Einstein, US (Germanborn) physicist (1879 1955)
Life is a long lesson
Life is a long lesson in humility., James M. Barrie, Scottish dramatist novelist (1860 1937)
The reward of a thing
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it., Ralph Waldo Emerson, US essayist poet (1803 1882)
A new scientific truth
A new scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents and making them to see the light, but rather because its opponents eventually die, and a new generation grows up that is familiar with it., Max Planck,
For most men life is a
For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed., Clifton Fadiman, US author, editor, radio host (1904 )
Liberals are very broa
Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side., Anonymous,
Anyone nitpicking enou
Anyone nitpicking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error that provoked it., Alvin Toffler,
An incompetent attorne
An incompetent attorney can delay a trial for months or years. A competent attorney can delay one even longer., Evelle J. Younger,
I believe in equality
I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
There is no such thing
There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence., Henry Adams, US author, autobiographer, historian (1838 1918)
Instant gratification
Instant gratification takes too long., Carrie Fisher, US author movie actress (1956 )
Competence, like truth
Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder., Laurence J. Peter, The Peter Principle (1969), chapter 1, US educator writer (1919 1988)
You can be a rank insi
You can be a rank insider as well as a rank outsider., Robert Frost, US poet (1874 1963)
Everybody gets so much
Everybody gets so much information all day long that they lose their common sense., Gertrude Stein, US author in France (1874 1946)
Both the cockroach and
Both the cockroach and the bird would get along very well without us, although the cockroach would miss us most., Joseph Wood Krutch, US author critic (1893 1970)
The capacity of human
The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animal., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
Most human beings have
Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted., Aldous Huxley, English critic novelist (1894 1963)
Honesty is the best po
Honesty is the best policy when there is money in it., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Honesty is a good thin
Honesty is a good thing, but it is not profitable to its possessor unless it is kept under control., Don Marquis, US humorist (1878 1937)
Oh, life is a glorious
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, A medley of extemporanea And love is a thing that can never go wrong And I am Marie of Romania., Dorothy Parker, Not So Deep as a Well (1937), Comment, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
In Hollywood a marriag
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk., Rita Rudner, US comedian )
Events in the past may
Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter., William Ralph Inge, English author Anglican prelate (1860 1954)
It is a curious thing.
It is a curious thing... that every creed promises a paradise which will be absolutely uninhabitable for anyone of civilized taste., Evelyn Waugh, English novelist satirist (1903 1966)
To be stupid, selfish,
To be stupid, selfish, and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost., Gustave Flaubert, French realist novelist (1821 1880)
One of the keys to hap
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory., Rita Mae Brown, US author and social activist )
Government is too big
Government is too big and too important to be left to the politicians., Chester Bowles, US diplomat economist (1901 1986)
A good listener is usu
A good listener is usually thinking about something else., Kin Hubbard, (1868 1930)
I agree with everythin
I agree with everything you say, but I would attack to the death your right to say it., Tom Stoppard, British dramatist screenwriter (1937 )
When people are free t
When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other., Eric Hoffer, (1902 1983)
People demand freedom
People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use., Soren Kierkegaard, Danish philosopher (1813 1855)
It is possible to be b
It is possible to be below flattery as well as above it., Thomas Babington Macaulay, English author politician (1800 1859)
If you believe the doc
If you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent if you believe the military, nothing is safe., Lord Salisbury,
An expert is a person
An expert is a person who avoids small error as he sweeps on to the grand fallacy., Benjamin Stolberg,
Blessed is he who expe
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed., Alexander Pope, Letter to Gay, October 6 1727, English poet satirist (1688 1744)
One of the first dutie
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine., Sir William Osler, Aphorisms from his Bedside Teachings 1961 p. 105, British (Canadianborn) physician (1849 1919)
I have never taken any
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Equal opportunity mean
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent., Laurence J. Peter, US educator writer (1919 1988)
People seem to enjoy t
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure., Russell Baker, US columnist journalist (1925 )
Egotism is the anesthe
Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity., Frank Leahy,
Education... has produ
Education... has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading., G. M. Trevelyan, English Social History (1942), British historian (1876 1962)
An economist is a man
An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible., Alfred A. Knopf,
It had only one fault.
It had only one fault. It was kind of lousy., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
Half of the modern dru
Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them., Dr. Martin Henry Fischer,
The quickest way of en
The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it., George Orwell, Polemic, May 1946 Second Thoughts on James Burnham, English essayist, novelist, satirist (1903 1950)
In archaeology you unc
In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known., Thomas Pickering, US diplomat (1931 )
The only difference be
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too., Oscar Levant, (1906 1972)
Under democracy one pa
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule and both commonly succeed, and are right., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
Democracy means govern
Democracy means government by discussion, but it is only effective if you can stop people talking., Clement Atlee,
It was such a lovely d
It was such a lovely day I thought it a pity to get up., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
Perhaps in time the so
Perhaps in time the socalled Dark Ages will be thought of as including our own., Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, (1742 1799)
Criminal: A person wit
Criminal: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation., Howard Scott, (1926 )
Who is rich? He that i
Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody., Benjamin Franklin, US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, printer (1706 1790)
Our constitution prote
Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
All animals are equal
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others., George Orwell, Animal Farm, English essayist, novelist, satirist (1903 1950)
I used to wake up at 4
I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
A conference is a gath
A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done., Fred Allen, US radio comedian (1894 1956)
The computer is a moro
The computer is a moron., Peter Drucker,
Let us make a special
Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation., Judith Martin, (Miss Manners),
Not even computers wil
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers., Edward Shepherd Mead,
The advantage of a cla
The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving., Russell Green,
Never raise your hand
Never raise your hand to your children it leaves your midsection unprotected., Robert Orben,
I am just going outsid
I am just going outside and may be some time., Captain Lawrence Oates, last words, (1880 1912)
A happy childhood is p
A happy childhood is poor preparation for human contacts., Colette, French novelist (1873 1954)
Early morning cheerful
Early morning cheerfulness can be extremely obnoxious., William Feather, (1908 1976)
A celebrity is a perso
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized., Fred Allen, US radio comedian (1894 1956)
Is fuel efficiency rea
Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperatelly? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down., Russell Baker, US columnist journalist (1925 )
The big thieves hang t
The big thieves hang the little ones., Czech Proverb,
Most modern calendars
Most modern calendars mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day that passes is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event., Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
I always wanted to be
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific., Jane Wagner, (and Lily Tomlin),
This paperback is very
This paperback is very interesting, but I find it will never replace a hardcover book it makes a very poor doorstop., Alfred Hitchcock, British movie director (1899 1980)
I find it rather easy
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me., John Cleese, English actor comedian (1939 )
Hell hath no fury like
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned., Milton Friedman, US economist (1912 )
The only thing that sa
The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is inefficiency. An efficient bureaucracy is the greatest threat to liberty., Eugene McCarthy, Time magazine, Feb. 12 1979, US politician (1916 )
Bureaucrats write memo
Bureaucrats write memoranda both because they appear to be busy when they are writing and because the memos, once written, immediately become proof that they were busy., Charles Peters,
Bureaucracy defends th
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status., Laurence J. Peter, US educator writer (1919 1988)
Every improvement in c
Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible., Frank Moore Colby,
What a blessing it wou
What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily as we open and shut our eyes!, Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, (1742 1799)
Banking establishments
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies., Thomas Jefferson, 3rd president of US (1743 1826)
Life is a foreign lang
Life is a foreign language all men mispronounce it., Christopher Morley, US author journalist (1890 1957)
The real problem is no
The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do., B. F. Skinner, US psychologist (1904 1990)
No degree of dullness
No degree of dullness can safeguard a work against the determination of critics to find it fascinating., Harold Rosenberg,
It is not necessary to
It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them., Pierre Beaumarchais, French businessman comic dramatist (1732 1799)
Appreciation is a wond
Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well., Voltaire, French author, humanist, rationalist, satirist (1694 1778)
Americans adore me and
Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
The eleventh commandme
The eleventh commandment Thou shalt not be found out is the only one that is virtually impossible to keep these days., Berta Buxton,
I stopped believing in
I stopped believing in Santa Claus at age six when my mother took me to see him in a store and he asked for my autograph., Shirley Temple Black,
I refuse to believe th
I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tunafish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock., Barbara Grizzuti Harrison,
I have too many fantas
I have too many fantasies to be a housewife. I guess I am a fantasy., Marilyn Monroe, US actress (1926 1962)
Marriage is not just s
Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash., Dr. Joyce Brothers, US psychologist television personality (1928 )
Writers should be read
Writers should be read but not seen. Rarely are they a winsome sight., Edna Ferber, US author (1887 1968)
Women are at last beco
Women are at last becoming persons first and wives second, and that is as it should be., May Sarton,
A vacation frequently
A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by mother, who sees that the others get it., Marcelene Cox,
When you are unhappy,
When you are unhappy, is there anything more maddening than to be told that you should be contented with your lot?, Kathleen Norris,
Those who are unhappy
Those who are unhappy have no need for anything in this world but people capable of giving them their attention., Simone Weil, French social philosopher (1909 1943)
Truth is always exciti
Truth is always exciting. Speak it, then, Life is dull without it., Pearl Buck, US novelist in China (1892 1973)
Americans detest all l
Americans detest all lies except lies spoken in public or printed lies., Edgar Watson Howe, US journalist (1853 1937)
The tourist may compla
The tourist may complain of other tourists, but he would be lost without them., Agnes Repplier, US essayist (1855 1950)
If you realize too acu
If you realize too acutely how valuable time it, you are too paralyzed to do anything., Katharine Butler Hathaway,
Everyone has talent. W
Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow talent to the dark place where it leads., Erica Jong,
It it not good to see
It it not good to see people who have been pretending strength all their lives lose it even for a minute., Lillian Hellman, US dramatist (1905 1984)
I like people who refu
I like people who refuse to speak until they are ready to speak., Lillian Hellman, US dramatist (1905 1984)
Who would ever think t
Who would ever think that so much went on in the soul of a young girl?, Anne Frank, German Jewish diarist (1929 1945)
All sins are attempts
All sins are attempts to fill voids., Simone Weil, French social philosopher (1909 1943)
The quickest way to kn
The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her., Marcelene Cox,
There are three social
There are three social classes in America: upper middle class, middle class, and lower middle class., Judith Martin, (Miss Manners),
To be a saint does not
To be a saint does not exclude fine dresses nor a beautiful house., Katherine Tynan Hinkson,
I am treating you as m
I am treating you as my friend asking you share my present minuses in the hope I can ask you to share my future pluses., Katherine Mansfield, New Zealand short story author (1888 1923)
Eating without convers
Eating without conversation is only stoking., Marcelene Cox,
Have you ever taken so
Have you ever taken something out of the clothes hamper because it had become, relatively, the cleanest thing?, Katharine Whitehorn,
My mother is such a lo
My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow., Rita Rudner, US comedian )
Humor distorts nothing
Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their pedestals., Agnes Repplier, US essayist (1855 1950)
Hope is a thing with f
Hope is a thing with feathers That perches in the soul, And sings the tune without words And never stops at all., Emily Dickinson, US poet (1830 1886)
To be a hero or a hero
To be a hero or a heroine, one must give an order to oneself., Simone Weil, French social philosopher (1909 1943)
Perhaps, after all, Am
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected., Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
They say that God is e
They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse., Emily Dickinson, US poet (1830 1886)
My passport photo is o
My passport photo is one of the most remarkable photographs I have ever seen no retouching, no shadows, no flattery just stark me., Anne Morrow Lindbergh,
Baby: an alimentary ca
Baby: an alimentary canal with a loud voice at one end and no responsibility at the other., Elizabeth Adamson,
People with bad consci
People with bad consciences always fear the judgement of children., Mary McCarthy,
Every man wants a woma
Every man wants a woman to appeal to his better side, his nobler instincts, and his higher nature and another woman to help him forget them., Helen Rowland, (1876 1950)
To love deeply in one
To love deeply in one direction makes us more loving in all others., Madame Swetchine,
It is really asking to
It is really asking too much of a woman to expect her to bring up her husband and her children too., Lillian Bell,
Changing husbands is o
Changing husbands is only changing troubles., Kathleen Norris,
What a pity, when Chri
What a pity, when Christopher Colombus discovered America, that he ever mentioned it., Margot Asquith,
Most people ignore mos
Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people., Adrian Mitchell,
Everyone makes a great
Everyone makes a greater effort to hurt other people than to help himself., Alexis Carrel, French biologist surgeon (1873 1944)
Elegance is refusal.,
Elegance is refusal., Coco Chanel, French fashion designer perfumer (1883 1971)
The argument of the br
The argument of the broken pane of glass is the most valuable argument in modern politics., Emmeline Pankhurst,
A woman can look book
A woman can look book moral and exciting ... if she also looks as if it was quite a struggle., Edna Ferber, US author (1887 1968)
Behind almost every wo
Behind almost every woman you ever heard of stands a man who let her down., Naomi Bliven,
All really great lover
All really great lovers are articulate, and verbal seduction is the surest road to actual seduction., Marya Mannes,
Plain women know more
Plain women know more about men than beautiful ones do., Katharine Hepburn, US actress (1907 2003)
Before a war, military
Before a war, military science seems a real science, like astronomy. After a war it seems more like astrology., Dame Rebecca West,
War has become a luxur
War has become a luxury that only small nations can afford., Hannah Arendt, US (Germanborn) historian social philosopher (1906 1975)
If you stop to be kind
If you stop to be kind, you must swerve often from your path., Mary Webb,
Virtue has its own rew
Virtue has its own reward, but no box office., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
On a plane you can pic
On a plane you can pick up more and better people than on any other public conveyance since the stagecoach., Anita Loos,
There are days when an
There are days when any electrical appliance in the house, including the vacuum cleaner, offers more entertainment than the TV set., Harriet Van Horne.,
It is a common delusio
It is a common delusion that you can make things better by talking about them., Dame Rose Macauley,
The United States is a
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced., Frank Zappa, US musician, singer, songwriter (1940 1993)
Most conversations are
Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of a witness., Margaret Miller,
The telephone is a goo
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink., Fran Lebowitz, US writer and humorist (1950 )
I am one of those unha
I am one of those unhappy persons who inspire bores to the greatest flights of art., Dame Edith Sitwell,
I fear nothing so much
I fear nothing so much as a man who is witty all day long., Madame de Sevigne,
Listening, not imitati
Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery., Dr. Joyce Brothers, US psychologist television personality (1928 )
There are men I could
There are men I could spend eternity with. but not this life., Kathleen Norris,
To err is human, but i
To err is human, but is feels divine., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
Whatever else can be s
Whatever else can be said about sex, it cannot be called a dignified performance., Helen Lawrenson,
The trouble with Ameri
The trouble with America is that there are far too many wideopen spaces surrounded by teeth., Charles Luckman,
When I appear in publi
When I appear in public, people expect me to neigh, grind my teeth paw the ground and swish my tail none of which is easy., Princess Anne,
I succeeded by saying
I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking., Joan Rivers, US comedienne (1935 )
The head never rules t
The head never rules the heart, but just becomes its partner in crime., Mignon McLaughlin,
It is a common enough
It is a common enough case, that of a man being suddenly captivated by a woman nearly the opposite of his ideal., George Eliot, English novelist (1819 1880)
Romance is the glamour
Romance is the glamour which turns the dust of everyday life into a golden haze., Elinor Glyn,
Sanity is a cozy lie.,
Sanity is a cozy lie., Susan Sontag, US author critic (1933 )
It was wonderful to fi
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Power is the ability n
Power is the ability not to have to please., Elizabeth Janeway,
One should only see a
One should only see a
I prefer liberty to ch
I prefer liberty to chains of diamonds., Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, English letter author poet (1689 1762)
The First Lady is an u
The First Lady is an unpaid public servant elected by one person her husband., Lady Bird Johnson, US wife of Lyndon Johnson 1934 (1912 )
They say that women ta
They say that women talk too much. If you have worked in congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men., Clare Booth Luce, US diplomat, dramatist, journalist, politician (1903 1987)
Politician talk themse
Politician talk themselves red, white, and blue in the face., Clare Booth Luce, US diplomat, dramatist, journalist, politician (1903 1987)
I wish the government
I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent., Dame Edith Sitwell,
I believe in censorshi
I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
I was born at the age
I was born at the age of twelve on an MGM lot., Judy Garland, US actress singer (1922 1969)
Some couples go over t
Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month, other just go over them., Sally Poplin,
The first time Adam ha
The first time Adam had a chance, he laid the blame on woman., Nancy Astor, British politician (1879 1964)
No nice men are good a
No nice men are good at getting taxis., Katharine Whitehorn,
In the arithmetic of l
In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing., Mignon McLaughlin,
Never give up and neve
Never give up and never face the facts., Ruth Gordon,
Love is the difficult
Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real., Iris Murdoch, British novelist (1919 1999)
Loves conquers all thi
Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
In love there are thin
In love there are things bodies and words., Joyce Carol Oates, US author (1938 )
The rule is perfect: i
The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane., Mark Twain, in Christian Science, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
To fall in love you ha
To fall in love you have to be in the state of mind for it to take, like a disease., Nancy Mitford,
Excessive literary pro
Excessive literary production is a social offense., George Eliot, a.k.a. Mary Ann Evans, English novelist (1819 1880)
Experience: A comb lif
Experience: A comb life gives you after you lose your hair., Judith Stern,
The woman whose behavi
The woman whose behavior indicates that she will make a scene if she is told the truth asks to be deceived., Elizabeth Jenkins,
A lady is one who neve
A lady is one who never shows her underwear unintentionally., Lillian Day,
I have flabby thighs,
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them., Joan Rivers, US comedienne (1935 )
There is nothing like
There is nothing like a good dose of another woman to make a man appreciate his wife., Clare Booth Luce, US diplomat, dramatist, journalist, politician (1903 1987)
The world wants to be
The world wants to be cheated. So cheat., Xaviera Hollander,
If the world were a lo
If the world were a logical place, men would ride side saddle., Rita Mae Brown, US author and social activist )
Friendship is not poss
Friendship is not possible between two women, one of whom is very well dressed., Laurie Colwin,
We can lie in the lang
We can lie in the language of dress or try ot tell the truth but unless we are naked and bald, it is impossible to be silent., Alison Lurie,
If it were natural for
If it were natural for father to care for their sons, they would not need so many laws commanding them to do so., Phyllis Chesler,
Egotism usually just
Egotism usually just a case of mistaken nonentity., Barbara Stanwyck,
Lack of education is a
Lack of education is an extraordinary handicap when one is being offensive., Josephine Tey,
It is easier to live t
It is easier to live through someone else than to become complete yourself., Betty Friedan,
All creative people sh
All creative people should be required to leave California for three months every year., Gloria Swanson, US actress (1899 1983)
There is not one femal
There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl., Joan Rivers, US comedienne (1935 )
Actions lie louder tha
Actions lie louder than words., Carolyn Wells,
My husband said he wan
My husband said he wanted to have a relationship with a redhead, so I dyed my hair., Jane Fonda,
Some people say that c
Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well., Missy Dizick,
The lovely thing about
The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twentyfive yearold men more., Collen McCullough,
Acting is standing up
Acting is standing up naked and turning around very slowly., Rosalind Russell,
Literature is strewn w
Literature is strewn with the wreckage of those who have minded beyond reason the opinion of others., Virginia Woolf, English novelist (1882 1941)
I would venture to gue
I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman., Virginia Woolf, English novelist (1882 1941)
I love acting. It is s
I love acting. It is so much more real than life., Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891, Irish dramatist, novelist, poet (1854 1900)
This Englishwoman is s
This Englishwoman is so refined She has no bosom and no behind., Stevie Smith,
If you educate a man y
If you educate a man you educate a person, but if you educate a woman you educate a family., Ruby Manikan,
Good girls go to heave
Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere., Helen Gurley Brown,
The penalty of success
The penalty of success is to be bored by people who used to snub you., Nancy Astor, British politician (1879 1964)
It is better to be loo
It is better to be looked over than overlooked., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
By whom?, Dorothy Park
By whom?, Dorothy Parker, when told she was outspoken, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
My personal hobbies ar
My personal hobbies are reading, listening to music, and silence., Edith Sitwell, English biographer, critic, novelist, poet (1887 1964)
If someone wants a she
If someone wants a sheep, then that means that he exists., Antoine de SaintExupery, The Little Prince, French writer (1900 1944)
Puritanism: The haunti
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
When a man meets catas
When a man meets catastrophe on the road, he looks in his purse, but a woman looks in her mirror., Margaret Turnbull,
I never realized until
I never realized until lately that women were supposed to be the inferior sex., Katharine Hepburn, US actress (1907 2003)
When women go wrong, m
When women go wrong, men go right after them., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
I never see what has b
I never see what has been done I only see what remains to be done., Madame Curie,
The prostitute is the
The prostitute is the only honest woman left in America., TyGrace Atkinson,
Oregano is the spice o
Oregano is the spice of life., Henry J. Tillman,
Nothing succeeds like
Nothing succeeds like address., Fran Lebowitz, US writer and humorist (1950 )
If pregnancy were a bo
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters., Nora Ephron,
The two most beautiful
The two most beautiful words in the English language are ``check enclosed.\, Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
The main difference be
The main difference between men and women is that men are lunatics and women are idiots., Rebecca West, Irish critic, journalist, novelist (1892 1983)
God is love, but get i
God is love, but get it in writing., Gypsy Rose Lee, US actress stripper (1914 1970)
My favorite animal is
My favorite animal is steak., Fran Lebowitz, US writer and humorist (1950 )
The best way to keep c
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant and let the air out of their tires., Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
This is not a novel to
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force., Dorothy Parker, book review, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
I feel like a million
I feel like a million tonight but one at a time., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
I married a German. Ev
I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me., Bette Midler, US actress, comedienne, singer (1945 )
Going to the opera, li
Going to the opera, like getting drunk, is a sin that carries its own punishment with it., Hannah More, 1775,
I feel sure that no gi
I feel sure that no girl would go to the altar if she knew all., Queen Victoria,
You should always beli
You should always believe what you read in the newspapers, for that makes them more interesting., Rose Macauley,
What a pity, when Chri
What a pity, when Christopher Columbus discovered America, that he ever mentioned it., Margot Asquith,
The average man, who d
The average man, who does not know what to do with his life, wants another one which will last forever., Anatole France, French novelist (1844 1924)
I was raised almost en
I was raised almost entirely on turnips and potatoes, but I think that the turnips had more to do with the effect than the potatoes., Marlene Dietrich, German movie actress (1901 1992)
I love children espec
I love children especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away., Nancy Mitford,
The cry of equality pu
The cry of equality pulls everyone down., Iris Murdoch, British novelist (1919 1999)
For what do we live, b
For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors and laugh at them in our turn?, Jane Austen, English novelist (1775 1817)
No more tears now I wi
No more tears now I will think about revenge., Mary Queen of Scots,
Family dinners are mor
Family dinners are more often than not an ordeal of nervous indigestion, preceded by hidden resentment and ennui and accompanied by psychosomatic jitters., M. F. K. Fisher,
What my mother believe
What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you., Nora Ephron,
Cooking is like love.
Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all., Harriet Van Horne,
Whenever I get married
Whenever I get married I start buying Gourmet Magazine., Nora Ephron,
My father was often an
My father was often angry when I was most like him., Lillian Hellman, US dramatist (1905 1984)
Life is a banquet, and
Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving., Rosalind Russell, as Aunti Mame,
The way to do research
The way to do research is to attack the facts at the point of greatest astonishment., Celia Green,
Until you lose your re
Until you lose your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was or what freedom really is., Margaret Mitchell, US novelist (1900 1949)
Striving for excellenc
Striving for excellence motivates you striving for perfection is demoralizing., Harriet Braiker,
Mothers, food, love, a
Mothers, food, love, and career, the four major guilt groups., Cathy Guisewite,
For the skeptic there
For the skeptic there remains only one consolation: if there should be such a thing as superhuman law it is administered with subhuman inefficiency., Eric Ambler,
Mothers are a biologic
Mothers are a biological necessity fathers are a social invention., Margaret Mead, US anthropologist popularizer of anthropology (1901 1978)
There exists no politi
There exists no politician in India daring enough to attempt to explain to the masses that cows can be eaten., Indira Gandhi, Indian politician (1917 1984)
The bitterest tears sh
The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone., Harriet Beecher Stowe, US abolitionist novelist (1811 1896)
Daughters go into anal
Daughters go into analysis hating their fathers and come out hating their mothers. They never come out hating themselves., Laurie Jo Wojcik,
Fortunately, psychoana
Fortunately, psychoanalysis is not the only way to resolve inner conflicts. Life itself remains a very effective therapist., Karen Horney,
When you were quite a
When you were quite a little boy, somebody ought to have said ``hush\ just once., Mrs Patrick Campbell, to George Bernard Shaw,
Politeness is half goo
Politeness is half good manners and half good lying., Mary Wilson Little,
Each has his past shut
Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can only read the title., Virginia Woolf, English novelist (1882 1941)
They are ill discovere
They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they can see nothing but sea., Sir Francis Bacon, English author, courtier, philosopher (1561 1626)
Dear Mary: We all knew
Dear Mary: We all knew you had it in you., Dorothy Parker, telegram to friend who had given birth, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
This is on me., Doroth
This is on me., Dorothy Parker, suggested for her tombstone, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
As I grow older and ol
As I grow older and older, And totter toward the tomb, I find that I care less and less Who goes to bed with whom., Dorothy Sayers,
In New York City, ever
In New York City, everyone is an exile, none more so than the Americans., Charlotte Perkins Gilman,
I do not want people t
I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me that trouble of liking them., Jane Austen, English novelist (1775 1817)
We met Dr. Hall in suc
We met Dr. Hall in such deep mourning that either his mother, his wife, or himself must be dead., Jane Austen, English novelist (1775 1817)
The easiest way for yo
The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any., Katharine Whitehorn,
Where large sums of mo
Where large sums of money are concerned, it is advisable to trust nobody., Agatha Christie, English mystery author (1890 1976)
Interestingly, accordi
Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
Probably the only plac
Probably the only place where a man can feel really secure is in a maximum security prison, except for the imminent threat of release., Germaine Greer,
A man is so in the way
A man is so in the way in the house., Elizabeth Gaskell,
One cannot be always l
One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty., Jane Austen, English novelist (1775 1817)
Women want mediocre me
Women want mediocre men, and men are working to become as mediocre as possible., Margaret Mead, US anthropologist popularizer of anthropology (1901 1978)
The ultimate indignity
The ultimate indignity is to be given a bedpan by a stranger who calls you by your first name., Maggie Kuhn,
It should be a very ha
It should be a very happy marriage they are both so much in love with him., Irene Thomas,
When you see what some
When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living., Helen Rowland, (1876 1950)
Being an old maid is l
Being an old maid is like death by drowning, a really delightful sensation after you cease to struggle., Edna Ferber, US author (1887 1968)
Nobody speaks the trut
Nobody speaks the truth when there is something they must have., Elizabeth Bowen, Irish novelist short story author (1899 1973)
She tells enough white
She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake., Margot Asquith,
Every little girl know
Every little girl knows about love. It is only her capacity to suffer because of it that increases., Francois Sagan,
Falling out of love is
Falling out of love is very enlightening. For a short while you see the world with new eyes., Iris Murdoch, British novelist (1919 1999)
In Hollywood, an equit
In Hollywood, an equitable divorce settlement means each party getting fifty percent of publicity., Lauren Bacall,
Van Gogh became a pain
Van Gogh became a painter because he had no ear for music., Nikki Harris,
Most men who are not m
Most men who are not married by the age of thirtyfive are either homosexual or really smart., Becky Rodenbeck,
A conservative is a ma
A conservative is a man who sits and thinks, mostly sits., Woodrow Wilson, 28th president of US (1856 1924)
Living in a vacuum suc
Living in a vacuum sucks., Adrienne Gusoff,
When mom found my diap
When mom found my diaphram, I told her it was a bathing cap for my cat., Liz Winston,
There are some people
There are some people who leave impressions not so lasting as the imprint of an oar upon the water., Kate Chopin,
I am ashamed of confe
I am ashamed of confessing that I have nothing to confess., Fanny Burney,
You cannot shake hands
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist., Indira Gandhi, Indian politician (1917 1984)
The older one grows, t
The older one grows, the more one likes indecency., Virginia Woolf, English novelist (1882 1941)
Imagination and fictio
Imagination and fiction make up more than three quarters of our real life., Simone Weil, French social philosopher (1909 1943)
Man is the only animal
Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he _becomes_ polite., Jean Kerr,
Our ability to delude
Our ability to delude ourselves may be an important survival tool., Jane Wagner,
Doctors and nurses are
Doctors and nurses are people who give you medicine until you die., Deborah Martin,
Humor is the first of
Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue., Virginia Woolf, English novelist (1882 1941)
Different taste in jok
Different taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections., George Eliot, English novelist (1819 1880)
One of the most diffic
One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is that assumption on the part of the staff that because you have lost your gall bladder you have also lost your mind., Jean Kerr,
I thought I told you t
I thought I told you to wait in the car., Tallulah Bankhead, on seeing a former lover for the first time in years, US movie actress (1903 1968)
Once a woman has forgi
Once a woman has forgiven a man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast., Marlene Dietrich, German movie actress (1901 1992)
Two paradoxes are bett
Two paradoxes are better than one they may even suggest a solution., Edward Teller, US (Hungarianborn) physicist (1908 2003)
People call me a femin
People call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute., Rebecca West, Irish critic, journalist, novelist (1892 1983)
It is better to be unf
It is better to be unfaithful than to be faithful without wanting to be., Brigitte Bardot,
Every year, back come
Every year, back come Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants., Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
One has a greater sens
One has a greater sense of degradation after an interview with a doctor than from any human experience., Alice Jones,
The most merciful thin
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents., H. P. Lovecraft, The Call of Cthulhu, first line, US horror supernatural author (1890 1937)
Cynicism is an unpleas
Cynicism is an unpleasant way of telling the truth., Lillian Hellman, US dramatist (1905 1984)
Ever notice that Soup
Ever notice that Soup For One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?, Elayne Boosler,
Politeness is one half
Politeness is one half good nature and the other half good lying., Mary Wilson Little,
A good listener is not
A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat., Katharine Whitehorn,
We want far better rea
We want far better reasons for having children than not knowing how to prevent them., Dora Russell,
Say what you want abou
Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins., Mae West, US movie actress (1892 1980)
A food is not necessar
A food is not necessarily essential just because your child hates it., Katharine Whitehorn,
Try to learn something
Try to learn something about everything and everything about something., Thomas H. Huxley, English biologist (1825 1895)
God forbid that any bo
God forbid that any book should be banned. The practice is as indefensible as infanticide., Rebecca West, Irish critic, journalist, novelist (1892 1983)
There are no ugly wome
There are no ugly women, only lazy ones., Helena Rubenstein,
Never trust a husband
Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near., Helen Rowland, (1876 1950)
The worst moment for a
The worst moment for an atheist is when he feels grateful and has no one to thank., Wendy Ward,
Art is one thing that
Art is one thing that
His voice was a intima
His voice was a intimate as the rustle of sheets., Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
A book of quotations .
A book of quotations . . . can never be complete., Robert M. Hamilton,
Having something to sa
Having something to say is overrated., Adair Lara,
Things are always dark
Things are always darkest just before they go pitch black., Kelly Robinson,
The sins of the father
The sins of the fathers are often visited upon the sonsinlaw., Joan Kiser,
I married the first ma
I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell my children that they just about throw up., Barbara Bush, US wife of George Bush 1945 (1925 )
An intellectual snob i
An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of The Lone Ranger., Dan Rather, US television newscaster (1931 )
Behind every successfu
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman., Maryon Pearson,
My motherinlaw had a p
My motherinlaw had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee., Phyllis Diller,
Life is hard. After al
Life is hard. After all, it kills you., Katherine Hepburn,
The only aspect of our
The only aspect of our travels that is interesting to others is disaster., Martha Gellman,
Travel, instead of bro
Travel, instead of broadening the mind, often merely lengthens the conversation., Elizabeth Drew,
Life is uncertain. Eat
Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first., Ernestine Ulmer,
My mother loved childr
My mother loved children she would have given anything if I had been one., Groucho Marx, US comedian with Marx Brothers (1890 1977)
Sex is a bad thing bec
Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes., Jackie Onassis,
Lead me not into tempt
Lead me not into temptation I can find the way myself., Rita Mae Brown, US author and social activist )
How many husbands have
How many husbands have I had? You mean apart from my own?, Zsa Zsa Gabor, US (Hungarianborn) actress (1919 )
Never do anything your
Never do anything yourself that others can do for you., Agatha Christie, English mystery author (1890 1976)
Opportunity knocked. M
Opportunity knocked. My doorman threw him out., Adrienne Gusoff,
I tried to commit suic
I tried to commit suicide by sticking my head in the oven, but there was a cake in it., Lesley Boone.,
I rely on my personali
I rely on my personality for birth control., Liz Winston,
Laziness is nothing mo
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired., Jules Renard, (1864 1910)
If Shakespeare had to
If Shakespeare had to go on an author tour to promote Romeo and Juliet, he never would have written Macbeth., Dr. Joyce Brothers, US psychologist television personality (1928 )
When the sun comes up,
When the sun comes up, I have morals again., Elayne Boosler,
A hundred years for no
A hundred years for now? All new people., Anne Lamott,
Brevity is the soul of
Brevity is the soul of lingerie., Dorothy Parker, US author, humorist, poet, wit (1893 1967)
Anyone with more than
Anyone with more than 365 pair of shoes is a pig., Barbara Melser Lieberman,
It is the mark of an e
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it., Aristotle, Greek critic, philosopher, physicist, zoologist (384 BC 322 BC)
To achieve the impossi
To achieve the impossible dream, try going to sleep., Joan Klempner,
Her only flair is in h
Her only flair is in her nostrils., Pauline Kael,
We owe something to ex
We owe something to extravagance, for thrift and adventure seldom go hand in hand., Jenny Jerome Churchill,
Give a man a fish and
Give a man a fish and he has food for a day teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him of the entire weekend., Zenna Schaffer,
To attract men, I wear
To attract men, I wear a perfume called ``New Car Interior.\, Rita Rudner, US comedian )
Always be nice to your
Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home., Phyllis Diller,
I told my motherinlaw
I told my motherinlaw that my house was her house, and she said, ``Get the hell off my property.\, Joan Rivers, US comedienne (1935 )
In New York City, one
In New York City, one suicide in ten is attributed to a lack of storage space., Judith Stone,
Giving birth is like t
Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head., Carole Burnett,
I come from a family w
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage., Erma Bombeck, US author humorist (1927 1996)
Canadians are cold so
Canadians are cold so much of the time that many of them leave instructions to be cremated., Cynthia Nelms,
I never realized until
I never realized until lately that women were supposed to be inferior., Katherine Hepburn,
Not only have women be
Not only have women been successful in entering fields in which men are supposed to have a more natural aptitude, but they have created entirely new businesses., Lucretia P. Hunter, ``The Girl Today, The Woman Tomorrow\, 1932,
Fortune does not chang
Fortune does not change men, it unmasks them., Suzanne Necker, (1739 1794)
The trouble with some
The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him., Cher, US actress singer (1946 )
The natural superiorit
The natural superiority of women is a biological fact, and a socially acknowledged reality., Ashely Montagu,
Man forgives woman any
Man forgives woman anything save the wit to outwit him., Minna Antrim,
Fashion is something t
Fashion is something that goes in one year and out the other., Denise Klahn,
Instant gratification
Instant gratification is not soon enough., Meryl Streep, US actress (1949 )
Sometimes I worry abou
Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world., Lily Tomlin, US actress comedienne (1939 )
The phone company hand
The phone company handles 84 billion calls a year everything from kings, queens, and presidents to the scum of the earth., Lilly Tomlin, as Ernestine the Operator,
He had a big head and
He had a big head and a face so ugly it became almost fascinating., Ayn Rand, US (Russianborn) novelist (1905 1982)
I was born because my
I was born because my mother needed a fourth for meals., Beatrice Lillie,
My mother buried three
My mother buried three husbands ... and two of them were only napping., Rita Rudner, US comedian )
The older I grow, the
The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes. Let the reader catch his own breath., Elizabeth Clarkson Zwart,
Fishing gives you a se
Fishing gives you a sense of where you fit in the sceme of things Your place in the universe...I, mean, here I am, one small guy with a fishing pole on this vast beach and out there in the blue expanse of ocean are these hundreds of millions of fish...laughing at me., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
Education is what you
Education is what you get from reading the fine print. Experience is what you get from not reading it., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
Not one shred of evide
Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
Do not regret growing
Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
Research is the proce
Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind., Marston Bates,
The more you run over
The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
If it is to be, it is
If it is to be, it is up to me., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
If you can spend a per
If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live., Lin Yutang,
If toast always lands
If toast always lands butterside down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?, Steven Wright, US comedian and actor (1955 )
If God dropped acid, w
If God dropped acid, would he see people?, Steven Wright, US comedian and actor (1955 )
If a word in the dicti
If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know?, Steven Wright, US comedian and actor (1955 )
I believe in God, only
I believe in God, only I spell it Nature., Frank Lloyd Wright, US architect (1869 1959)
The very powerful and
The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. Instead of altering their views to fit the facts, they alter the facts to fit their views...which can be very uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs altering., Doctor Who,
According to classical
According to classical aerodynamics, it is impossible for a bumblebee to fly., Doctor Who,
It may be irrational o
It may be irrational of me, but human beings are quite my favorite species., Doctor Who,
Anybody remotely inter
Anybody remotely interesting is mad, in some way or another., Doctor Who,
Logic merely enables o
Logic merely enables one to be wrong with authority., Doctor Who,
First things first, bu
First things first, but not necessarily in that order., Doctor Who,
I have the heart of a
I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf., Robert Bloch, US horror science fiction author (1917 1994)
Rest is for the weary,
Rest is for the weary, sleep is for the dead., Doctor Who,
Good place to put thin
Good place to put thingscellars., Doctor Who,
Resistance is useless.
Resistance is useless., Doctor Who,
If people did not some
If people did not sometimes do silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done., Wittgenstein,
A week is a long time
A week is a long time in politics., Harold Wilson, (1916 1995)
In the future everyone
In the future everyone will be worldfamous for fifteen minutes., Andy Warhol, US artist (1928 1987)
I really wonder what g
I really wonder what gives us the right to wreck this poor planet of ours., Kurt Vonnegut, US novelist (1922 )
Most people would like
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch., Robert Orben,
Be careful what you pr
Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be., Kurt Vonnegut, US novelist (1922 )
Know the masculine, ke
Know the masculine, keep to the feminine., Lao Tzu,
When you have an effic
When you have an efficient government, you have a dictatorship., Harry S Truman, 33rd president of US (1884 1972)
It does not do to leav
It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him., J. R. R. Tolkein,
If I have any beliefs
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
Let us not look back i
Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
I think that maybe if
I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere., James Thurber, US author, cartoonist, humorist, satirist (1894 1961)
Like having your own l
Like having your own licence to print money., Lord Thomson of Fleet,
Every now and then whe
Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether., H.S. Thompson,
Science is to see what
Science is to see what everyone else has seen but think what no one else has thought., Albert SzentGyorgyi,
If you talk to God, yo
If you talk to God, you are praying. If God talks to you, you have schizophrenia., Thomas Szasz,
There is nothing stron
There is nothing stronger in the world than gentleness., Han Suyin,
No man really becomes
No man really becomes a fool until he stops asking questions., Charles Steinmetz,
What is the difference
What is the difference between unethical and ethical advertising? Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the public., Vilhjalmur Stefansson, Canadian explorer ethnologist (1879 1962)
Whatever is worth doin
Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well., Phillip Stanhope,
We learn from experien
We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
The perfect love affai
The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
The golden rule is tha
The golden rule is that there are no golden rules., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
It is most unwise for
It is most unwise for people in love to marry., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
All great truths begin
All great truths begin as blasphemies., George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist socialist (1856 1950)
Finally, in conclusion
Finally, in conclusion, let me say just this., Peter Sellers, English comic movie actor (1925 1980)
Happiness is nothing m
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory., Albert Schweitzer, French philosopher physician (1875 1965)
Truth has no special t
Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now always., Albert Schweitzer, French philosopher physician (1875 1965)
Everything has been fi
Everything has been figured out except how to live., JeanPaul Sartre, French author existentialist philosopher (1905 1980)
Those who cannot remem
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it., George Santayana, US (Spanishborn) philosopher (1863 1952)
I know but one freedom
I know but one freedom, and that is the freedom of the mind., Antoine de SaintExupery, French writer (1900 1944)
The scientific theory
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage., Mark Russell, US comedian, political commentator, satirist (1932 )
If you are going to do
If you are going to do something wrong at least enjoy it., Leo Rosten, US (Polishborn) author (1908 )
Misquotations are the
Misquotations are the
The only limit to our
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts about reality., Franklin Delano Roosevelt,
The only thing we have
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself., Franklin Delano Roosevelt,
Everybody is ignorant,
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects., Will Rogers, US humorist showman (1879 1935)
The vast possibilities
The vast possibilities of our great future will become realities only if we make ourselves responsible for that future., Gifford Pinchot,
I am always doing that
I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it., Pablo Picasso, Spanish Cubist painter (1881 1973)
Never tell people how
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do, and they will surprise you with their ingenuity., George S. Patton, US general (1885 1945)
The optimist thinks th
The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true., Robert Oppenheimer,
There are no exception
There are no exceptions to the rule that everybody likes to be an exception to the rule., George Osner,
Who controls the past
Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past., George Orwell, English essayist, novelist, satirist (1903 1950)
All animals are equal
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others., George Orwell, English essayist, novelist, satirist (1903 1950)
Big Brother is watchin
Big Brother is watching you., George Orwell, English essayist, novelist, satirist (1903 1950)
I take a simple view o
I take a simple view of life: keep your eyes open and get on with it., Sir Laurence Olivier,
It is hard to let old
It is hard to let old beliefs go. They are familiar. We are comfortable with them and have spent years building systems and developing habits that depend on them. Like a man who has worn eyeglasses so long that he forgets he has them on, we forget that the world looks to us the way it does because we have become used to seeing it that way through a particular set of lenses. Today, however, we need new lenses. And we need to throw the old ones away., Kenich Ohmae,
God, grant me the sere
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference., Reinhold Niebuhr, US Protestant theologian (1892 1971)
The city is not a conc
The city is not a concrete jungle, it is a human zoo., Desmond Morris,
Science has proof with
Science has proof without any certainty. Creationists have certainty without any proof., Ashley Montague,
One of the advantages
One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries., A. A. Milne, English juvenile author (1882 1956)
When shit becomes valu
When shit becomes valuable, the poor will be born without assholes., Henry Miller, US author (1891 1980)
I expect Woman will be
I expect Woman will be the last thing civilized by Man., George Meredith, English novelist poet (1828 1909)
The basic fact about h
The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore., Henry Louis Mencken,
It is even harder for
It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man., Henry Louis Mencken,
For every problem, the
For every problem, there is one solution which is simple, neat and wrong., Henry Louis Mencken,
No one ever went broke
No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public., Henry Louis Mencken,
Marriage is a wonderfu
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution., Henry Louis Mencken,
The only really happy
The only really happy folk are married women and single men., Henry Louis Mencken,
Love is the triumph of
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence., Henry Louis Mencken,
Excess on occasion is
Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
An unfortunate thing a
An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
Death is a very dull,
Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
The ability to quote i
The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
Military intelligence
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms., Groucho Marx, US comedian with Marx Brothers (1890 1977)
Get up, stand up Stand
Get up, stand up Stand up for your rights Get up, stand up Never give up the fight., Bob Marley,
You are not superior j
You are not superior just because you see the world in an odious light., Vicomte de Chateaubriand, French author politician (1768 1848)
Politics is war withou
Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed., Mao Tsetung, Chinese Communist politician (1893 1976)
Political power grows
Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun., Mao Tsetung, Chinese Communist politician (1893 1976)
In waking a tiger, use
In waking a tiger, use a long stick., Mao Tsetung, Chinese Communist politician (1893 1976)
A man is the sum of hi
A man is the sum of his actions, of what he has done, of what he can do, nothing else., Andre Malraux, French author resistance leader (1901 1976)
Practical people would
Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming., J.P. McEvoy,
Ambition is a poor exc
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy., Charlie McCarthy,
The new electronic int
The new electronic interdependence recreates the world in the image of a global village., Marshall McLuhan, Canadian author, educator, philosopher (1911 1980)
The medium is the mess
The medium is the message., Marshall McLuhan, Canadian author, educator, philosopher (1911 1980)
I have noticed that th
I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them., E.V. Lucas,
Where facts are few, e
Where facts are few, experts are many., Donald R. Gannon,
Every generation think
Every generation thinks it has the answers, and every generation is humbled by nature., Phillip Lubin,
Love anything and your
Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casketsafe, dark, motionless, airlessit will change. It will not be broken it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable., C. S. Lewis, English essayist juvenile novelist (1898 1963)
Life is what happens w
Life is what happens while you are making other plans., John Lennon, English singer songwriter (1940 1980)
All we are saying is g
All we are saying is give peace a chance., John Lennon, English singer songwriter (1940 1980)
Power corrupts. Absolu
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat, John Lehman, Secretary of the US Navy, 19811987, US administrator (1942 )
There are three side e
There are three side effects of acid. Enchanced long term memory, decreased short term memory, and I forget the third., Timothy Leary, US psychologist promoter of mindaltering drugs (1920 1996)
Turn on, tune in and d
Turn on, tune in and drop out., Timothy Leary, US psychologist promoter of mindaltering drugs (1920 1996)
Human beings are seven
Human beings are seventy percent water, and with some the rest is collagen., Martin Mull, US comedian and actor (1943 )
All men dream: but not
All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, to make it possible., T. E. Lawrence,
The difference between
The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in determination., Tommy Lasorda,
Life is too short for
Life is too short for traffic., Dan Bellack,
Hatred paralyzes life
Hatred paralyzes life love releases it. Hatred confuses life love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life love illuminates it., Martin Luther King,
Injustice anywhere is
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere., Martin Luther King,
In the long run, we ar
In the long run, we are all dead., John Maynard Keynes, English economist (1883 1946)
My interest is in the
My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there., Charles F. Kettering, US electrical engineer inventor (1876 1958)
Only those who dare to
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly., Robert F Kennedy,
When the going gets to
When the going gets tough, the tough get going., Joseph P Kennedy,
And so, my fellow Amer
And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you ask what you can do for your country., John F Kennedy,
If a free society cann
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich., John F Kennedy,
The work goes on, the
The work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still lives and the dreams shall never die., Edward Kennedy,
The pendulum of the mi
The pendulum of the mind alternates between sense and nonsense, not between right and wrong., Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist (1875 1961)
Everything that irrita
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves., Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist (1875 1961)
Religion is a defense
Religion is a defense against the experience of God., Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist (1875 1961)
Mistakes are the porta
Mistakes are the portals of discovery., James Joyce, Irish author (1882 1941)
All marriages are mixe
All marriages are mixed marriages., Chantal Saperstein,
The most efficient lab
The most efficient laborsaving device is still money., Franklin P Jones,
Always and never are t
Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use., Wendell Johnson,
It is always the best
It is always the best policy to tell the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar., Jerome K Jerome,
We was robbed!, Joe Ja
We was robbed!, Joe Jacobs,
Sometimes being pushed
Sometimes being pushed to the wall gives you the momentum necessary to get over it!, Peter de Jager,
Great ideas need landi
Great ideas need landing gear as well as wings., C. D. Jackson,
Consistency is contrar
Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to life. The only completely consistent people are dead., Aldous Huxley, English critic novelist (1894 1963)
Technological progress
Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards., Aldous Huxley, English critic novelist (1894 1963)
To achieve the impossi
To achieve the impossible dream, try going to sleep., Joan Klempner,
From the moment I pick
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it., Groucho Marx, US comedian with Marx Brothers (1890 1977)
Facts do not cease to
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored, Aldous Huxley, English critic novelist (1894 1963)
We seem to have a comp
We seem to have a compulsion these days to bury time capsules in order to give those people living in the next century or so some idea of what we are like. I have prepared one of my own. I have placed some rather large samples of dynamite, gunpowder, and nitroglycerin. My time capsule is set to go off in the year 3000. It will show them what we are really like., Alfred Hitchcock, British movie director (1899 1980)
It is not the mountain
It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves., Sir Edmund Hillary,
The beginning of knowl
The beginning of knowledge is the discovery of something we do not understand., Frank Herbert, US science fiction novelist (1920 1986)
Happiness in intellige
Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know., Ernest Hemingway, US author journalist (1899 1961)
But did thee feel the
But did thee feel the earth move?, Ernest Hemingway, US author journalist (1899 1961)
Courage is grace under
Courage is grace under
Some people are born m
Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them., Joseph Heller, US novelist (1923 )
Catch 22, Joseph Helle
Catch 22, Joseph Heller, US novelist (1923 )
We are just an advance
We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special., Stephen Hawking, English cosmologist and physicist (1942 )
My goal is simple. It
My goal is simple. It is a complete understanding of the universe, why it is as it is and why it exists at all., Stephen Hawking, English cosmologist and physicist (1942 )
It is my supposition t
It is my supposition that the Universe in not only queerer than we imagine, is queerer than we CAN imagine., J.B.S. Haldane,
We do not inherit this
We do not inherit this land from our ancestors we borrow it from our children., Haida Indian saying,
As you journey through
As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something., Hagar the Horrible,
The illusion that time
The illusion that times that were are better than those that are, has probably pervaded all ages., Horace Greeley,
Anyone who goes to a p
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined., Samuel Goldwyn, US (Polishborn) movie producer (1882 1974)
Whoever controls the m
Whoever controls the mediathe imagescontrols the culture., Allen Ginsberg,
Believe those who are
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it., Andre Gide, French critic, essayist, novelist (1869 1951)
Live as you will have
Live as you will have wished to have lived when you are dying., Christian Furchtegott Gellert,
If the aborigine draft
If the aborigine drafted an IQ test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it., Stanley Garn,
Freedom is not worth h
Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
A coward is incapable
A coward is incapable of exhibiting love it is the prerogative of the brave., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
The only tyrant I acce
The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
An eye for eye only en
An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
Delusions of grandeur
Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself., Jane Wagner,
The good man is the fr
The good man is the friend of all living things., Mahatma Gandhi, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
I could prove God stat
I could prove God statistically., George Gallup, US statistician pollster (1901 1984)
The conventional view
The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking., John Kenneth Galbraith, US (Canadianborn) administrator economist (1908 )
He who chooses the beg
He who chooses the beginning of the road chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determines the end., Harry Emerson Fosdick, US clergyman (1878 1969)
My best friend is the
My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me., Henry Ford, US automobile industrialist (1863 1947)
History is more or le
History is more or less bunk., Henry Ford, US automobile industrialist (1863 1947)
Anyone who says busine
Anyone who says businessmen deal in facts, not fiction, has never read old fiveyear projections., Malcom Forbes,
Bond. James Bond., Ian
Bond. James Bond., Ian Fleming,
The test of a firstfat
The test of a firstfate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise., F. Scott Fitzgerald, US novelist (1896 1940)
Sex is hereditary. If
Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you wont either., Joseph Fischer,
Never give a sucker an
Never give a sucker an even break., W. C. Fields, US actor (1880 1946)
The two most abundant
The two most abundant things in the universe are Hydrogren and stupidity., Harlan Ellison, US science fiction author screenwriter (1934 )
It is only the great m
It is only the great men who are truly obscene. If they had not dared to be obscene, they could never have dared to be great., Havelock Ellis, English sexual psychologist (1859 1939)
I hate war as only a s
I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its futility, its stupidity., Dwight D. Eisenhower, US general Republican politician (1890 1969)
He who lives by the sw
He who lives by the sword, will eventually be wiped out by some bastard with a sawn off shotgun, Steady Eddy,
History teaches us tha
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely when they have exhausted all other alternatives., Abba Eban, Israeli (S. Africanborn) diplomat politician (1915 2002)
People ask for critici
People ask for criticism, but they only want praise., W. Somerset Maugham, English dramatist novelist (1874 1965)
Go ahead, make my day.
Go ahead, make my day., Dean Riesner, Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry in Sudden Impact, 1983,
Never judge a book by
Never judge a book by its movie., J.W. Eagan,
A man is a success if
A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do., Bob Dylan, US singer songwriter (1941 )
If you can dream it, y
If you can dream it, you can do it., Walt Disney, US cartoonist movie producer (1901 1966)
Love your enemies just
Love your enemies just in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards., R. A. Dickson,
Reality is that which
Reality is that which refuses to go away when I stop believing in it., Phillip K. Dick,
The first half of our
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children., Clarence Darrow, US defense lawyer (1857 1938)
When a dog bites a man
When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news., Charles Anderson Dana,
The only difference be
The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad, Salvador Dali, Spanish Catalan Surrealist painter (1904 1989)
Exterminate., The Dale
Exterminate., The Daleks (Doctor Who),
A good listener is a g
A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat., Katharine Whitehorn,
You may be deceived if
You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough., Frank Crane,
Human beings are the o
Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home., Bill Cosby, US comedian television actor (1937 )
Fatherhood is pretendi
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soaponarope., Bill Cosby, US comedian television actor (1937 )
There are two types of
There are two types of peoplethose who come into a room and say, Well, here I am! and those who come in and say, Ah, there you are., Frederick L Collins,
It may be that our rol
It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship Godbut to create him., Arthur C. Clarke, English physicist science fiction author (1917 )
The soul would have no
The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears., John Vance Cheney,
Historians are like de
Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them., Leo Tolstoy, Russian mystic novelist (1828 1910)
Rest in peace. The mis
Rest in peace. The mistake shall not be repeated., Cenotaph in Hiroshima,
How far you go in life
How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these., George Washington Carver,
An honest politician i
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought., Simon Cameron, US financier politician (1799 1889)
You will never find ti
You will never find ti
Take away the right to
Take away the right to say fuck and you take away the right to say fuck the government., Lenny Bruce, (1923 1966)
All technology should
All technology should be assumed guilty until proven innocent., David Brower,
What happens to the ho
What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone?, Bertolt Brecht, German Communist dramatist (1898 1956)
War is like love it al
War is like love it always finds a way., Bertolt Brecht, German Communist dramatist (1898 1956)
Documentation is like
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good and when it is bad, it is better than nothing., Dick Brandon,
Feeding the starving p
Feeding the starving poor only increases their number., Ben Bova,
Laughter is the shorte
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people., Victor Borge, US (Danishborn) comedian pianist (1909 2000)
For most folks, no new
For most folks, no news is good news for the press, good news is not news., Gloria Borger,
The opposite of a corr
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth., Niels Bohr, Danish physicist (1885 1962)
Never express yourself
Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think., Niels Bohr, Danish physicist (1885 1962)
Consider the postage s
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there., Josh Billings, US Humorist (1818 1885)
Television is the firs
Television is the first truly democratic culture the first culture available to everybody and entirely governed by what the people want. The most terrifying thing is what people do want., Clive Barnes,
The greatest pleasure
The greatest pleasure
You white people are s
You white people are so strange. We think it is very primitive for a child to have only two parents., Australian Aboriginal Elder,
The ability to delude
The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool., Jane Wagner,
The three fundamental
The three fundamental Rules of Robotics...One: a robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm...Two:..a robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law...Three: a robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First and Second Laws., Isaac Asimov, US science fiction novelist scholar (1920 1992)
From what we get, we c
From what we get, we can make a living what we give, however, makes a life., Arthur Ashe,
Our lives improve only
Our lives improve only when we take chances and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves., Walter Anderson,
Interestingly, accordi
Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thoughtparticularly for people who can never remember where they have left things., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
More than any time in
More than any time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
I took a speedreading
I took a speedreading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
The good people sleep
The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy the waking hours much more., Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
It was a book to kill
It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead., Dame Rose Macaulay, English novelist (1881 1958)
It is a good morning e
It is a good morning exercise for a research scientist to discard a pet hypothesis every day before breakfast. It keeps him young., Konrad Lorenz, German (Austrianborn) ethologist (1903 1989)
The man who views the
The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life., Muhammad Ali, US boxer (1942 )
Float like a butterfly
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee., Muhammad Ali, US boxer (1942 )
Houston, Tranquility B
Houston, Tranquility Base here. The eagle has landed., Buzz Aldrin,
Civilization is the di
Civilization is the distance man has placed between himself and his excreta., Brian Aldiss,
The creator of the uni
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers., Scott Adams, US cartoonist (1957 )
There is a theory whic
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
In the beginning, the
In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry, and has been widely regarded as a bad idea., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
The difference between
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug., Mark Twain, US humorist, novelist, short story author, wit (1835 1910)
Human beings, who are
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
Anyone who is capable
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
Time is an illusion, l
Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so., Douglas Adams, English humorist science fiction novelist (1952 2001)
An author is a fool wh
An author is a fool who, not content with boring those he lives with, insists on boring future generations., Charles de Montesquieu, French lawyer philosopher (1689 1755)
You cannot shake hands
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist., Indira Gandhi, quoted by Christian Science Monitor, May 17 1982, Indian politician (1917 1984)
War is not nice., Barb
War is not nice., Barbara Bush, US wife of George Bush 1945 (1925 )
Never attribute to mal
Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity., Nick Diamos,
Of those who say nothi
Of those who say nothing, few are silent., Thomas Neill,
The great thing about
The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid., Art Spander,
Food is an important p
Food is an important part of a balanced diet., Fran Lebowitz, US writer and humorist (1950 )
The reason there are t
The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver., Jay Leno, US comedian television host (1950 )
I believe that all gov
I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time., H. L. Mencken, US editor (1880 1956)
The intermediate stage
The intermediate stage between socialism and capitalism is alcoholism., Norman Brenner,
Every nation ridicules
Every nation ridicules other nations, and all are right., Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher (1788 1860)
An expert is a person
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field., Niels Bohr, Danish physicist (1885 1962)
There is no monument d
There is no monument dedicated to the memory of a committee., Lester J. Pourciau,
The easiest way for yo
The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any., Katharine Whitehorn,
I detest lifeinsurance
I detest lifeinsurance agents they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so., Stephen Leacock, Canadian economist humorist (1869 1944)
We live in an age when
We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police., Jeff Marder,
All paid jobs absorb a
All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind., Aristotle, Greek critic, philosopher, physicist, zoologist (384 BC 322 BC)
Chess is as elaborate
Chess is as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you can find outside an advertising agency., Raymond Chandler, US detective novelist screenwriter (1888 1959)
Anybody who watches th
Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead., Erma Bombeck, US author humorist (1927 1996)
Nobody in the game of
Nobody in the game of football should be called a genius. A genius is somebody like Norman Einstein., Joe Theismann, Former quarterback,
The great thing about
The great thing about television is that if something important happens anywhere in the world, day or night, you can always change the channel., From Taxi,
Brass bands are all ve
Brass bands are all very well in their place outdoors and several miles away., Sir Thomas Beecham, English conductor (1879 1961)
There cannot be a cris
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full., Henry Kissinger, US (Germanborn) diplomat scholar (1923 )
Fashion is something t
Fashion is something that goes in one year and out the other., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
We forfeit threefourth
We forfeit threefourths of ourselves in order to be like other people., Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher (1788 1860)
I tend to live in the
I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there., Herb Caen,
We are inclined to bel
We are inclined to believe those whom we do not know because they have never deceived us., Samuel Johnson, English author, critic, lexicographer (1709 1784)
Blame someone else and
Blame someone else and get on with your life., Alan Woods,
It is a common delusio
It is a common delusion that you make things better by talking about them., Dame Rose Macaulay, English novelist (1881 1958)
Architecture is the ar
Architecture is the art of how to waste space., Philip Johnson, US architect (1906 2005)
Living in a vacuum suc
Living in a vacuum sucks., Adrienne E. Gusoff, US teacher, humorist and greeting card writer )
I can think of nothing
I can think of nothing less pleasurable than a life devoted to pleasure., John D. Rockefeller, US oil industrialist philanthropist (1839 1937)
I would never die for
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong., Bertrand Russell, British author, mathematician, philosopher (1872 1970)
What I look forward to
What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death., Dave Barry, US columnist humorist (1947 )
It is impossible to en
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do., Jerome K. Jerome, British humor writer (1859 1927)
One has a greater sens
One has a greater sense of intellectual degradation after an interview with a doctor than from any human experience., Alice James,
They certainly give ve
They certainly give very strange names to diseases., Plato, Greek author philosopher in Athens (427 BC 347 BC)
I told the doctor I br
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places., Henny Youngman, US (Englishborn) comedian (1906 1998)
The entire economy of
The entire economy of the Western world is built on things that cause cancer., From the 1985 movie Bliss,
Preserving health by t
Preserving health by too severe a rule is a worrisome malady., Francois de La Rochefoucauld, French author moralist (1613 1680)
I was a vegetarian unt
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight., Rita Rudner, US comedian )
It is always the best
It is always the best policy to speak the truthunless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar., Jerome K. Jerome, British humor writer (1859 1927)
The secret of eternal
The secret of eternal youth is arrested development., Alice Roosevelt Longworth, US author wit (1884 1980)
Children are all forei
Children are all forei
I envy people who drin
I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on., Oscar Levant, (1906 1972)
When I read about the
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading., Henny Youngman, US (Englishborn) comedian (1906 1998)
My mother buried three
My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping., Rita Rudner, US comedian )
I have often depended
I have often depended on the blindness of strangers., Adrienne E. Gusoff, US teacher, humorist and greeting card writer )
Not only is life a bit
Not only is life a bitch, it has puppies., Adrienne E. Gusoff, US teacher, humorist and greeting card writer )
Operationally, God is
Operationally, God is beginning to resemble not a ruler but the last fading smile of a cosmic Cheshire cat., Sir Julian Huxley, English administrator biologist (1887 1975)
How is it possible to
How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?, Woody Allen, US movie actor, comedian, director (1935 )
Life is a moderately g
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act., Truman Capote, US author (1924 1984)
The purpose of life is
The purpose of life is to fight maturity., Dick Werthimer,
Reality is the leading
Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it., Jane Wagner, (and Lily Tomlin),
Reality is something y
Reality is something you rise above., Liza Minnelli, US actress singer (1946 )
They say that God is e
They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse., Emily Dickinson, US poet (1830 1886)
The right to be heard
The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously., Hubert H. Humphrey, US politician (1911 1978)
When a thing has been
When a thing has been said and well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it., Anatole France, French novelist (1844 1924)
I think it would be a
I think it would be a good idea., Mahatma Gandhi, when asked what he thought of Western civilization, Indian ascetic nationalist leader (1869 1948)
It is easier to forgiv
It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend., William Blake, English engraver, illustrator, poet (1757 1827)
Nothing is more conduc
Nothing is more conducive to peace of mind than not having any opinions at all., Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, (1742 1799)
God help those who do
God help those who do not help themselves., Wilson Mizner, US screenwriter (1876 1933)
Nothing ever goes away
Nothing ever goes away., Barry Commoner, US biologist educator (1917 )
I shot an arrow into t
I shot an arrow into the air, and it stuck., Graffito, in Los Angeles,
Nice guys finish last,
Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in., Evan Davis,
One machine can do the
One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man., Elbert Hubbard, US author (1856 1915)
I have a rock garden.
I have a rock garden. Last week three of them died., Richard Diran,
Last night I dreamed I
Last night I dreamed I ate a tenpound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone., Tommy Cooper,
All phone calls are ob
All phone calls are obscene., Karen Elizabeth Gordon,
Ninety percent of ever
Ninety percent of everything is crap., Theodore Sturgeon, US science fiction author (1918 1985)
Television has proved
Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other., Ann Landers, US advice columnist (1918 2002)
Hollywood is a place w
Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation., Walter Winchell, US gossip columnist broadcast journalist (1897 1972)
When dealing with the
When dealing with the insane, the best method is to pretend to be sane., Hermann Hesse, Swiss (Germanborn) author (1877 1962)
Editor: a person emplo
Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed., Elbert Hubbard, US author (1856 1915)
Smoking is one of the
Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics., Fletcher Knebel,
War is a series of cat
War is a series of catastrophes that results in a victory., Georges Clemenceau, French politician (1841 1929)
The wages of sin are u
The wages of sin are unreported., Unknown, Quotations by unknown authors )
My problem lies in rec
My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income., Errol Flynn, US (AustralianTasmanianborn) movie actor (1909 1959)
Life is just one damne
Life is just one damned thing after another., Elbert Hubbard, US author (1856 1915)
There must be more to
There must be more to life than having everything., Maurice Sendak, US juvenile illustrator (1928 )
I have enough money to
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something., Jackie Mason, US comedian (1934 )
People who work sittin
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up., Ogden Nash, US humorist poet (1902 1971)
Nothing fails like suc
Nothing fails like success., Gerald Nachman,
It is a sign of a cree
It is a sign of a creeping inner death when we no longer can praise the living., Eric Hoffer, (1902 1983)
As a wellspent day bri
As a wellspent day brings happy sleep, so a life well used brings a happy death., Leonardo Da Vinci, Italian engineer, painter, sculptor (1452 1519)
A man should live if o
A man should live if only to satisfy his curiosity., Yiddish Proverb,
Curiosity in children,
Curiosity in children, is but an appetite for knowledge. One great reason why children abandon themselves wholly to silly pursuits and trifle away their time insipidly is, because they find their curiosity balked, and their inquiries neglected., John Locke, English empiricist philosopher (1632 1704)
It is strange that we
It is strange that we do not temper our resentment of criticism with a thought for our many faults which have escaped us., Author Unknown,
Criticism is the disap
Criticism is the disapproval of people, not for having faults, but having faults different from your own., Author Unknown,
It is usually best to
It is usually best to be generous with praise, but cautious with criticism., Author Unknown,
There is one way to ha
There is one way to handle the ignorant and malicious critic. Ignore him., Author Unknown,
Half of the secular un
Half of the secular unrest and dismal, profane sadness of modern society comes from the vain ideas that every man is bound to be a critic for life., Henry Van Dyke,
Neither praise nor bla
Neither praise nor blame is the object of true criticism. Justly to discriminate, firmly to establish, wisely to proscribe, and honestly to award these are the true aims and duties of criticism., Simms,
In my wide association
In my wide association in life, meeting with many and great men in various parts of the world, I have yet to find the man, however great or exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than he would ever do under a spirit of criticism., Charles M. Schwab,
Ten censure wrong, for
Ten censure wrong, for one that writes amiss., Alexander Pope, Essay on Criticism, English poet satirist (1688 1744)
We are suffering from
We are suffering from too much sarcasm., Marianne Moore,
Doubtless criticism wa
Doubtless criticism was originally benignant, pointing out the beauties of a work rather that its defects. The passions of men have made it malignant, as a bad heart of Procrustes turned the bed, the symbol of repose, into an instrument of torture., Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, US poet (1807 1882)
Ours is an age of crit
Ours is an age of criticism, to which everything must be subjected. The sacredness of religion, and the authority of legislation, are by many regarded as grounds for exemption from the examination by this tribunal, But, if they are exempted, and cannot lay claim to sincere respect, which reason accords only to that which has stood the test of a free and public examination., Immanuel Kant, German philosopher (1724 1804)
It is a barren kind of
It is a barren kind of criticism which tells you what a thing is not., R. W. Griswold,
Most of our censure of
Most of our censure of others is only oblique praise of self, uttered to show the wisdom and superiority of the speaker. It has all the insidiousness of selfpraise, and all the illdesert of falsehood., Tyron Edwards,
If you believe in what
If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done., Dale Carnegie,
A good writer is not n
A good writer is not necessarily a good book critic. No more so than a good drunk is automatically a good bartender., Jim Bishop,
It is folly for an emi
It is folly for an eminent person to think of escaping censure, and a weakness to be affected by it. All the illustrious persons of antiquity, and indeed of every age, have passed through this fiery persecution. There is no defense against reproach but obscurity it is a kind of concomitant to greatness, as satires and invectives were an essential part of a Roman triumph., Joseph Addison, English essayist, poet, politician (1672 1719)
Creative power, is tha
Creative power, is that receptive attitude of expectancy which makes a mold into which the plastic and as yet undifferentiated substance can flow and take the desired form., Thomas Troward,
Thoughts give birth to
Thoughts give birth to a creative force that is neither elemental nor sidereal. Thoughts create a new heaven, a new firmament, a new source of energy, from which new arts flow. When a man undertakes to create something, he establishes a new heaven, as it were and from it the work that he desires to create flows into him. For such is the immensity of man that he is greater than heaven and earth., Philipus Aureolus Paracelsus, German (Swissborn) alchemist physician (1493 1541)
Because women live cre
Because women live creatively, they rarely experience the need to depict or write about that which to them is a primary experience and which men know only at a second remove. Women create naturally, men create artificially., Ashley Montagu,
First, I do not sit do
First, I do not sit down at my desk to put into verse something that is already clear in my mind. If it were clear in my mind, I should have no incentive or need to write about it. We do not write in order to be understood we write in order to understand., Robert Cecil Day Lewis,
Never explainyour frie
Never explainyour friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway., Elbert Hubbard, US author (1856 1915)
What can you say about
What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive?, Irv Kupcinet,